Friday, August 15, 2008

Tonight Tacoma is Margaritaville

Tonight Lulu and her first husband are coming over, along with 4 surprise guests with a total of 12 legs among the 4 of them.

Preparations for tonight's elaborate gourmet production have been underway for hours. At noon Kristin came home to assist in the precise cutting of the 2 extremely delicate chickens. These are specially bred chickens who were raised naturally on wholesome feed and bottled water in a happy environment. Until their death sentence. That day wasn't too happy. But they were given special treats on their final day and were executed to one of Braum's lullabies.

We have freshly picked, organically grown sweet corn, grown in the fertile Puyallup valley by a farmer's commune that practices only totally carbon neutral methods of farming. No gas-powered equipment. All is done by hand tools and horses.

Along with the all-natural chicken we will have a variety of garden greens from another co-op, this one run by a group of ex-Amish women who tired of their male dominated culture back in Ohio. Our salad of greens will be mixed with some yellow grape tomatoes that have been marinated in a cilantro-wine sauce, with whole wheat croutons soaked in olive oil before being roasted in our wood-fired oven and coated with hand ground, imported from Albania, natural Romano made from virgin milk from goats that live on the slopes of Mount Barbullush.

We will have only one selection of salad dressing, made from the hand-expressed oil of rare south Indian sesame seeds mixed with vintage walnut oil from a barrel in Morocco dating back to 1956. A variety of herbs with complicated names and cheeses with equally complicated names flavor the salad dressing. It is delicious. You can't get it at Trader Joes.

For dessert we will be grilling Washington peaches, delivered this morning, fresh from an orchard on the outskirts of Leavenworth where each peach is given special attention during it's entire growth cycle and it's own name. Tonight we will be eating Ginger, George, Sadie, Peaches, Penelope, Lucy, Betty and Sam. The peaches will be topped with roasted coconut infused with rosemary essence and topped with homemade vanilla bean ice cream made with 10% milkfat cream we got from a local dairy this morning.

Our signature drink for the evening will be Pomegranate/Raspberry Margaritas. The juice from 325 individual pomegranate seeds has been expressed and stored at precisely 32.5 degrees. Raspberry syrup, drained from fresh canned raspberries, made under my mother's watchful eye, will be combined with the pomegranate juice and mixed with Jose Cuervo Special Edition Ultra Dark Limited Edition Tequila, spritzed with the juice from imported extra large Tahitian limes. And cooled with ice cut from a glacier in northern Alaska.

It's a simple little dinner, perfect for Lulu and her first husband.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Seriously, when can we arrange that DNA test?

Anonymous said...

I wonder where their toilet paper comes from? Or what tree or cotton plant gave its pampered life? Can you pamper cotton plants? I'll bet they can.