Wednesday, June 24, 2009

100 Degree Naked Tandy Hills Hiking In Deadly Air Pollution

In the photo you are looking at the stunning skyline of beautiful downtown Fort Worth, as filtered through a Level Red Air Pollution Alert, viewed from the western side of the Tandy Hills, near the I-30 freeway.

This afternoon I was feeling cooped up and cranky. I'd been to the Kemah Boardwalk, near Houston, virtually, this morning. After that I went north to Southlake, non-virtually.

The past two days I did get in my morning swim, but yesterday the 100 degree plus outdoor oven had me not feeling it, or wanting to feel it.

By early afternoon my physical therapist, Dr. L.C., was telling me, despite the warnings from the National Weather Service that the elderly should not go outside in this dangerous air, that she thought I had to, or my crankiness could turn ugly.

So, sometime after 4 in the afternoon, with Mother Nature heating it up to 101, I took off to the Tandy Hills Natural Area to be natural. I wore cooling mesh shorts, not my usual cargo shorts, because my intention was to try the Naked Hiking thing again. I knew there was absolutely no chance that there would be any other idiot in this 6 million person Metroplex, so deranged, as to be out hiking in killer temps in killer air, so there was no more chance of running into another human, whilst sans outerwear, than there is where I am right now.

I gotta tell you, I've decided there is something to this skinnyhiking thing. I ended up hiking for well over an hour. I did not overheat. The only time I broke out into rivers of sweat was when I stopped to get a drink or look at something.

Abrupt subject change.

We appear to be building to a possible storm. There has been one short burst of hail and some wind. High temperatures wreak havoc with stability, both weather-wise and mental-wise.

Tomorrow morning I think I'm heading to New Braunfels and a place called Schlitterbahn. That should be interesting. Jammin Mole has volunteered to do some of the driving and buy some gas. I told her that was not necessary.

See you tomorrow.


Gar said...

Last time I went to Schlitterbahn, J'Mole went with me. Good times :). She can tell you all about it.

Durango said...

That true, Jammin M.? That's being rather active to play at a waterpark. Did Gar have an attack of the vapors at any point?

Cheap Tricks and Costly Truths said...

Gar must have me confused with that pretty lil' blonde he used to be sweet on...oh so long ago

If that were our senior year...remember I was "banned" from any extra curricular activities...long story ;)

Gar said...

I don't believe the "pretty lil' blonde" was smart enough to be invited.

It's all a haze. I guess I'm thinking of the trip the previous year (not to Schlitterbahn).

I remember a whole slew of people being banned from the nerd parade. I don't remember you being one of them.

Cheap Tricks and Costly Truths said...

Gar,'ve forced my hand. The NHS trip that I took with you as well as with about 6 other people during our junior year was to Bandera, TX (btw, that's a great little cow town). We stayed at some little Dude Ranch of some sorts, played golf, went swimming, hung out at the Purple Cow Saloon, and rented a very bad movie...The Last House on the Left (which was remade this year). I can tell you right now, that Gar didn't walk on the golf course...he used one of those motorized cart thingys. I'm afraid the exertion from walking would have definitely given him the vapors. :)

Durango said...

In high school you kids all had fake I.D.s and were able to hang out in saloons? Gar golfed? Would not the club swinging bring on the vapors, even with no walking involved? Am I understanding correctly? Gar lied to me when he told me you went to the Schlitterbahn with him and could provide me colorful details? If Gar went to the Schlitterbahn how did he get to the top of the slides? There are no elevators, you have to climb your way to the top. So many questions.

Gar said...

I think J'Mole has a much better memory than I do.

Bandera, TX sounds familiar and I remember staying at some ranch house. I don't remember golfing. I certainly don't remember going to a saloon (is that why you were banned from Schlitterbahn?). I don't remember renting a movie.

I've discovered recently that only scary activity gives me the vapors (like rollerblading and bike riding). I don't know why. I think the nervous energy wipes me out.

Durango said...

Well, this is a breakthrough, you've ceased denying that you get the vapors. You'd not said, before, that you found the perfectly sedate activities of roller blading and bike riding to be scary. I should have figured that out. You lasted 2 minutes on roller blades before collapsing on a bench while whining about needing a beer or two.

Jammin M got banned from Schlitterbaun? Was it some sort of Footloose Scandal? Where the preacher's daughter had been banned from dancing but rebelled and was caught dirty dancing with the bad boy in school? The one with the mullet hair? Is this the reason you were asked to leave Wink?

Cheap Tricks and Costly Truths said...

I could be like Euripides and question everything, learn something, but answer nothing :)

I can tell you that yes...I was banned for "something" I did as the preacher's daughter...A possible bad boy or boys maybe were involved, with or without mullets.

Gar, as far as you having little or no memory of these events...could it be because of all the hot & steamy makeout sessions with the lil' blonde? Interfering with your synapses firing properly? Now, could SHE be the reason you were asked to leave Wink?

Gar said...

All these hints and allegations are making me a bit nauseous.

I like the sounds of you being banned because of possible bad boys. I am surprised that this story has fled from my memory. Your activities with multiple boys getting you banned from a trip to Schlitterbahn would likely be high quality blog fodder.

I do recollect make out sessions with a blonde. Nothing interferes with a teenage boys synapses like a make out session with a 'lil blonde.

I don't remember being asked to leave.

Cheap Tricks and Costly Truths said...

Gar, it was during one of your make out sessions with the blonde on the band bus that my activity with multiple bad boys occurred. I wouldn't say it's great blog material...

Durango said...

All I'm getting outta this is I wish I went to HS in Wink. Mine sucked compared to the wild stuff you kids apparently did in the isolated environs of West Texas. Band bus activity with multiple bad boys? My only memory of a band bus is getting hit on the head with a clarinet. I've lived such a sad, sheltered life.