Saturday, June 27, 2009

Today I Am 34 Years Old

Alma, the Songbird of the Texas Gulf Coast, is always sending me good, funny, upbeat stuff via email. Alma is the opposite of a toxic person. She is more like a daily happy tonic.

Some of this morning's messages bordered on the bizarre, with those bizarre ones, for the most part, emanating from Facebook world, that being a world who's charm has not quite revealed itself to me, yet. As in I don't quite get it.

Maybe it has something to do with it being something like 2 decades now I've been, in some way or the other, social networking via a computer.

And then there was a blog comment this morning that said I looked like a thuggish, gangster porn star. I'm not quite sure what that is, but I liked the sound of it. Then again the source of this compliment was someone with demonstrably bad taste in multiple areas, so I suppose I must consider the source and not be too thrilled at being described as a thuggish, gangster porn star.

Back to Alma. This morning she sent me a link to a website that calculates ones Virtual Age. I took the test and learned I am a virtual 34.5 year old with a life expectancy of 97.5. A 34.5 year old thuggish, gangster porn star.

Life is good. And now it's time to go swimming.


Cheap Tricks and Costly Truths said...

That was fun, I'm 26.4 virtual years old. I'm supposed to live for another 47 years.

I'm thinking that the true reason for the comment about your pic from envy. Yep, he wants one of those Orbison shirts.

Durango said...

So, I'm about 8 years older than you. Your life expectancy is only 73.4? How did that happen. I'm gonna last til 97.5. Which means I'm lasting 24.1 more years than you. I'm sorry about that.

I think you are likely correct in your Gar analysis. He is envious of the shirt and jealous that he is way too shy to be a porn star. And too weak to be a thuggish gangster. You really can not be a thug or a gangster or a porn star if you are prone to severe attacks of the vapors. I wish there were a way we could help the boy overcome his shortcomings, but I fear it is hopeless.

cd0103 said...

Happy Birthday!

Durango said...

Thanks, cd. I can't believe I'm so old.

Gar said...

You guys spend a lot of time doing Gar analysis.

I never take those virtual age quizzes. They are depressing. It's almost as bad as watching the news.

If you come to any conclusions in your analysis, let me know. It's always entertaining.

twister said...

Life is like a roller coaster. Youth begins like the roller coaster inching slowly up the hill, and at twenty five or so you just top your first hill. Life is good and all you survey is yours for the taking, but the pause is only for a moment...seconds really. And bang! You crash down your first hill and wow I'm thirty! There's no slowing down from here, podner, we gotta make room for the other people standing in line. Waiting, waiting to take the ride.

Durango said...

Gar---People have trouble understanding you to to the extreme complexity of your nature. That is why so much time is spent trying to analyze you.

I can understand why you don't take those virtual age surveys. I ran the survey again, only using your data, as best I knew it, with the ones I did not know, giving you the highest mark by default, and even then, when the survey was done it said you'd died when you were 32. I'm sorry, I had no idea.

Durango said...

Great summation of the reality of life you wrote there, Mister Twister.