Only Child Syndrome: Part III

Way back when I first blogged about Only Child Syndrome it was one of my ways to try and understand some astonishingly weird behavior I had been subjected to last summer. At the time I wrote about the Syndrome I didn't realize that there are a lot of other people out there equally perplexed by the vexing Only Child Syndrome.

Every day a lot of people come to my bloggings about Only Child Syndrome. They come from all over the world. Awhile back I found that Google has my Only Child Syndrome blogging in the #1 spot. I do not understand why. There is a lot more detailed Only Child Syndrome information out there than my musings.

There has been a lot of research into the Syndrome, a lot of papers written, there's a lot of opinion out there. Strangely, some of the research and opinion tries to claim there is no such thing as Only Child Syndrome. It's likely that that research and those opinions were from Only Children in denial, because the amount of anecdotal Only Child Syndrome info out there, from those who believe the Syndrome is real, because they've been victims of it, would seem to validate the reality of Only Child Syndrome. Many of the Only Child Syndrome victims believe the Syndrome should be treated as a disease with a search for a cure.

The common behaviors that people seem to experience when dealing with this disease is the Only Child is universally self-centered, self-absorbed and lacking in self-awareness. Only Children are insensitive, can say the rudest of things, are often downright mean. However, the Only Child has extremely thin skin, will get upset at the slightest perceived provocation. In the Only Child's world it can do no wrong, can get away with anything. The Only Child will get very upset if someone treats it the way it treats others.

Tootsie Tonasket has an Only Child who exhibits all the classic behaviors. On his MySpace page, in his profile, part of his self-description is, "I am an Only Child, so I expect all the focus to be on me." All the Only Children I've known have that attitude. What is sad, very few have the social skills to cause the focus to be on them. So, it becomes a demand for attention. Or they go to bizarre lengths to get attention and be the focus.

The attention getting behaviors can be things like dressing odd, eating like a pig, getting drunk and obnoxious, committing a crime, overdrafting a bank account, having a fit or assuming an elevated air of accomplishment. For instance, doing some simple task like baking cookies or some handicraft type thing and then acting as if they are a gourmet chef or a creative artist of the top order.

Only Children often tout themselves. They'll tell you what fabulous taste they have. They'll be quick to denigrate the taste of others or say something is beneath their taste level. The Only Child will set itself up on a pedestal from which it will dispense accolades to those it deigns to honor. But it is always self-serving, it is always, in reality, about the Only Child, not about the object of the Only Child's twisted praise.

The Only Child can be a social miscreant of the most venal low-life sort and yet give itself permission to talk about how it warms their heart to see someone doing such good for humanity, giving the Only Child hope for the world of the future. The Only Child is very rarely aware of their flagrant, ironic, hypocrisy.

The Only Child can be the laziest, sloppiest, most unkempt type of individual, basically living in squalor with a filthy floor, unwashed dishes and clutter everywhere. And not hesitate for a second to comment about someone else's standards. The Only Child always has an excuse for the messes in its wake. It is never their fault. The dishes didn't get washed because there was something more important to do. "You can't expect everyone to be like you," the Only Child says when asked why there are so many dirty dishes. "Clean dishes and a clean house are not the most important thing in my life," as if what is important in its life was the point. Turning a question about dirty dishes into the issue having to do with what's important in its life is classic Only Child Syndrome nonsense.

The Only Child can turn an inquiry about a health issue, such as if you ask if a grossly overweight Only Child wouldn't feel better if they lost a few hundred pounds, the Only Child will say something like, "If other people have a problem with me being fat I don't care. I'm happy with how I look." Where a non-Only Child Syndrome person would say something like, "I wish I could get the weight off, it's so hard, I know I'd be happier, I'd fit on a plane better and I'd feel better on a beach. Thanks for caring about my health."

The Only Child can be a grossly overweight slob, homely to a degree painful to the eye, dress like a cartoon character, yet think nothing of commenting on someone else's looks, clothes, or weight.

Only Children are immune from hearing the irony of what comes out of their mouths.

Okay, that is enough Only Children rambling for the day. The next time I blog about Only Children I'll tell you about the worst cases I've ever experienced. And they both have the same first name! Along with many many many other shared attributes.