In Texas With Theodore Ryan & Ruby Jean Jones

You are looking at the twins, Theodore Ryan and Ruby Jean, born, I think, 2 weeks ago. In the Washington town that goes by the name of Tacoma.

The Jones Twins look awfully tiny to me.

The twins were sent to me, in Texas, via email.

I have not been informed, currently, what exactly is my relationship to TR & RJ. I know I share no genetic connection. However, that just seems like a technicality. Having the same last name cements the relationship deal.

I'm sure that's how it works.

I remember the last time I held a baby in my arms. It was sometime in the spring of 2000, in Mount Vernon, Washington. I held the baby for about a half a minute when it threw up all over me. Those watching the baby throw up all over me found it amusing. I did not.

The last time I tried to change a baby diaper was sometime in 1981. I was baby sitting my nephew Jason. His diaper needed changing. These were old-fashioned diapers, not those new-fangled Pamper things.

I laid my nephew down on newspapers and removed the bad diaper. I got the horrendous mess cleaned up, but then could not figure out how to install the replacement diaper. I called one of my roommates, at work, and she came home and finished the job for me.

Later that night, after Jason's parental units had picked him up and returned home, I got a call from my now ex-sister-in-law asking me why Jason had newsprint all over his butt. Said in a very accusatory tone.

And now here is more trivia.

The roommate who helped me change the diaper, way back in 1981, moved to Ada, Oklahoma one month before I moved to Texas. A little over two years after that a mutual friend from Washington flew in to D/FW. I drove her up to Ada the next day. I so clearly recollect sitting outside, up in Oklahoma, and remarking to my two other Washington natives, something like "if 20 years ago I had told the two of you that in 20 years hence we would be sitting under a pine tree in Oklahoma sipping wine, would either of you have been able to conceive of a scenario where that could possibly make sense?'

Neither could.

And now there is Theodore Ryan & Ruby Jean.

What a world.

So little of it I understand.