Microsoft OneDrive Has Me Remembering Fetching An Ostrich Egg With Miss Puerto Rico

Second day in a row a Microsoft OneDrive memory showed up in my email, with me remembering what one of the memories was remembering.

That being the one you see above.

This memory did not take place in November. It was February 16, 2016. I was driving Miss Puerto Rico to the airport to fly to her home island.

I knew I was taking a backroads route to the airport. I thought Miss Puerto Rico would get fussy as soon as I did not get on the freeway, and instead headed east on Randol Mill Road. That road soon leads to farm country, with cows and other such things.

Miss Puerto Rico had lived at the same location as me, way longer, yet she had never been down this road before.

I expected Miss Puerto Rico to get fully animated when I stopped at a mailbox by a sprawling ranch, opened it and pulled out a large egg.

Shortly thereafter Miss Puerto Rico took the photo of me holding the ostrich egg.

Eventually Miss Puerto Rico asked how I knew there would be an egg in that mailbox.

I said I got a text message from Mary K, that morning, telling me there would be an egg in the mailbox.

Miss Puerto Rico asked no further questions. She was not an inquisitive sort...

A Botched Albertsons ATM Heist Soon Had Me Chasing Puerto Rican Floor Monkeys

Around noon I walked over to Albertsons hoping to find this week's Fort Worth Weekly.

I was barely in the door when I found FW Weekly, along with Miss Puerto Rico removing money from an ATM.

Miss Puerto Rico did not see me come up behind her. Even so, jabbing a finger in her back, hoping to replicate a pistol barrel, along with the demand that she hand over the money yielded zero loot in my first ever robbery attempt.

Instead I soon found myself going on a roller coaster ride in Miss Puerto Rico's 4 wheel drive vehicle known as a Jeep. During the course of the roller coaster ride Miss Puerto Rico told me her baby floor monkeys missed me after so greatly enjoying me taking care of them for a week, a week or two ago, whilst Miss Puerto Rico was visiting the island for which she is named.

So this afternoon, needing a break from the relentless task of editing 387 webpages, adding code like  to make a non-mobile friendly website into a more mobile friendly website, I hiked over to Miss Puerto Rico's for a visit with the baby floor monkeys who had been missing me.

I was greeted at the door by the baby floor monkey now known as Bella, who quickly ran away. I found her sister, now known as Stella, on her favorite bed perch.

Previously Stella had been the difficult to corral kitty, but today Stella seemed quite happy to have me pick her up for some heavy petting, sufficient enough to put her in full bore purr mode.

I took the picture you see above of the beautiful blue sky view from Miss Puerto Rico's balcony, said goodbye to the baby floor monkeys, remembered to set the alarm, and then returned here where I am now going to return to being an HTML code monkey....

Hiking The Non-Toxic Tandy Hills After A Morning Of Toxic TV Trouble

I've been having me a day and it's only the middle of the afternoon.

This morning an unexpected complication kept me from going swimming.

The lack of swimming started the day off without my usual salubrious endorphin stimulation.

Yesterday I acquired a big TV. Too big. It has overwhelmed by technical abilities to get it to work with the AT & T U-Verse DVR deal.

When I first plugged in the new TV it instantly worked fine. But, after I installed it where I wanted it to sit and turned it on again, all I get is snow. I thought maybe the cable was malfunctioning, so I plugged in the old TV. At first it did not work. And then it did.

I have now, for now, given up on getting this new TV to work again.

I recollect having TV trouble at my sister's in Kent. She was in California on vacation. I was unable to figure out how to turn on the TV til my sister called and walked me through it.

After I gave up on the TV I called my bank and got a problem fixed. That pleased me.

And then I went hiking on the Tandy Hills. That also pleased me. The Barnett Shale Seismic Testers have made no further intrusion on to the Tandy Hills.

I told Miss Puerto Rico I'd install new speakers and sub-woofer on her computer today. I suspect that will go about as well as the TV installation.

Jack In The Box Catches Miss Puerto Rico's Counterfeit $20 Bill Operation

Thursday Miss Puerto Rico was on a fast food run for her co-workers. First stop was at Taco Bueno. Miss Puerto Rico called me as she waited in the drive-thru to tell me she was looking at more police cars than she ever remembered seeing.

This turned out to be part of a police chase gone very bad.

Little did Miss Puerto Rico know, at the time, that she was about to have herself a major run-in with the law.

Miss PR's next fast food stop was at the Jack in the Box at I-820 and John T. White/Bridge Street Road.

Jack took Miss PR's order through his Box. Miss PR pulled up to the pay for your food window. Handed the Jack in the Box moneytaker a $20 bill, with the moneytaker, who I believe was the manager, hollering, "Stop cooking that order, she gave me a fake $20 bill."

Miss Puerto Rico was very embarrassed. The Jack in the Box workers were quite rude.

So, Miss PR showed up back at work with only the Taco Bueno food.

This happened on a Thursday. Friday morning Miss PR was barely at work when a detective showed up to grill her about her counterfeiting operation. Sometimes American ways can unsettle Miss PR. This would be one of those times. Luckily a co-worker interceded, somewhat.

Eventually, after a lot of questioning, the detective decided to let Miss Puerto Rico remain free. For now.

So, I find this entire scenario very troubling. I accept the fact that there has always been counterfeiting. And it's a bad thing. However, the U.S. government estimates that less than 1/100 of 1 percent of U.S. paper currency is counterfeit.

Miss Puerto Rico acquired her bogus $20 bill at her bank's ATM.

It was only the first use of that bogus $20 bill, when spent by the counterfeiter, that a crime took place.

After that, the bogus $20 was in circulation, just like any other $20 bill, you know, the ones printed by the government.

Jack in the Box could have given Miss Puerto Rico her Jumbo Jacks and then sent the bogus $20 bill out with another customer, or deposited it in the bank. No harm done. Or am I missing something?

It seems like a HUGE waste of resources to go after someone like Miss PR to investigate her for counterfeiting. I mean, how likely is it that a counterfeiter is going to use a fake bill to buy some fast food, with the counterfeiter knowing, likely better than most, that the bill is going to be checked?

Which leads to another question. You can't spend a $20 bill these days, in most places, without the felt pen type test being done to it. So, to safely spend a bogus $20 bill, you'd need to use it at a self-pay type place or flea markets and garage sales. This seems like an awful lot of bother to go through for some petty transactions.

The counterfeiters must have some means of getting the bogus bills into circulation, with the counterfeiters making money on it somehow.

It's very perplexing. I really think Jack in the Box owes Miss Puerto Rico an apology and a couple free Jumbo Jacks. She was a victim. Not a criminal.

Now, if you are worried that you may have a wallet full of bogus $20 bill, something called WikiHow has a webpage with an awful lot of steps you can go through to check the validity of your money.

Seems easier to me to just use a debit card.

It Has Been A Rainy Tuesday In Fort Worth With More Water On The Way

Rain dripped from above until after noon today. I don't think we've seen the last of the wet stuff. The forecast is for more wetness for the next 5 days.

Around 3 this afternoon I needed to escape from rubbing my fingertips sore on a keyboard.

So, I hiked over to Miss Puerto Rico's balcony to enjoy the slightly cool breeze and the view of the retreating storm.

Having said that. I just walked outside for a second. Wet stuff is falling again. Though not in copious amounts.

Texas in summer, in the past 2 days, has become like a Washington winter. Except warmer. But the rain seems way too familiar. Except here, in Texas, the rain falls with extreme prejudice in a volume I never saw in Washington.

Well, there was the Thanksgiving Flood in the 1990s. I remember 5 inches of rain falling within a couple hours in a Texas-style downpour. This wreaked all sorts of havoc of the flooding sort. Not flash floods. More massive than that.

In Texas you don't have snowmelt due to rising temperatures sending massive amounts of water into the rivers, because Texas removed its mountains years ago. I think around the time Texas removed its Native Americans. Mountains and Indians went to Oklahoma. I may be misinformed about this.

I remember during the Thanksgiving Flood staying up late sandbagging the dike in downtown Mount Vernon, to save the downtown. The crest of the flood was expected to breech the sandbags. A HUGE crowd gathered to wait for the crest.

Suddenly the river dropped a couple feet. It was a major what the hell moment. Within an hour it was known that a dike further down river had failed, flooding what is known as Fir Island. The release of pressure saved downtown Mount Vernon.

Massive efforts were made to repair the dike breech following the Thanksgiving Flood. And then 2 weeks later it happened again.

I sort of miss this type of weather drama. But, actually, Texas weather drama outdoes Washington weather drama, for the most part. The snow can get a bit more wicked there, it can get colder, Pacific typhoons can be a bit breezy, a Washington HEAT WAVE is a torture Texans can not imagine.

Because few people in Washington have air conditioning. Due to not needing it, except for a couple days a decade.

It has been a good last Tuesday of June 2010. Up late the night before, up before dawn's crack, learned that the Queen of Wink is okay, and hopefully safely back in Wink. And I went swimming in the rain this morning. Does not get much better than that.

My drippy forecast below....

In Texas With Incoming Rain & Melting Ice Cream

You are looking out my computer room window at the dawn of the last Monday of June 2010.

As you can clearly see, it's the dawn of another beautiful day in Texas.

However, as Monday unfolds it may get a bit less beautiful, or even more beautiful, if your idea of a beautiful day is rain. As in there is a 50% chance of the wet stuff falling today. Supposedly.

Speaking of wet stuff falling. Sunday afternoon Miss Puerto Rico called me, desperate for my help. Miss PR had told a friend of ours that she'd deliver her a waffle cone from Braums. When I was told of the mission I thought it had amusement possibilities. I ended up being correct in that assumption.

The Braums drive through ordering was like something out of a sit-com, only more so. As in, if this was in a scripted TV show you'd think they were exaggerating it way too much.

Miss PR's accent is not very strong. She clearly said "A waffle cone with vanilla and chocolate."

The Braums person said "One Coke with hot fudge?"

Miss PR said no, then repeated her order.

The Braums person then said, "You want 2 small cones, one vanilla, one chocolate?"

Again Miss PR corrected the order and again the Braums person would get it wrong. We went through 5 cycles of this, both me and Miss PR were cracking up. I then, really loudly and really clearly, and with no accent, said, "we want 1 waffle cone with vanilla & chocolate."

That'll be $2.15 at the window, the Braums person then said.

With the waffle cone securely in my hands we were now in a rush to deliver it. Did I mention we were in Miss PR's air conditioner-less jeep? At almost 100 degrees. Within 10 seconds the ice cream began to drip. Miss PR called the ice cream recipient to tell her to be outside ready to accept the melting ice cream in about 20 seconds.

The ice cream cone successfully changed hands and I was not rendered too sticky by the ordeal.

I suffered through way too much Miss Puerto Rico drama over the weekend.

Sunday Morning Looking Out My Computer Room Window & Thinking About Last Night's Fight At Miss Puerto Rico's

You are looking at the last Sunday of June view from my computer room window, looking out at my bedroom balcony.

As you can see, it is a blue sky Sunday. Currently, at 9:48:25 it is 84.3, heading into the high 90s. We have yet to have a 100 degree day this summer in my zone of Texas.

I don't know why, because it has not been cooler, but my pool water was refreshingly cooler this morning. Or so it seemed.

Last night I was over at Miss Puerto Rico's. The view from her balcony reliably provides entertainment, particularly on Saturday night, as humanity in various forms passes by on various forms of transportation. Including walking.

We witnessed a rather heated confrontation between a guy, who was being very stylish by wearing his pants down below his underwear, and a plus-sized gal who did not seem to have sufficient material to cover her assets properly.

After about 10 minutes of hollering and shoving a Fort Worth police cruiser cruised by and stopped. The officer calmed the combatants and then continued on his way. I did not have my camera with me, which is very rare, so I could not photo document the droopy drawer and floopy boob fight.

I don't know if I'm going to go get aerobic on hills today. Swimming for an hour seems to provide a bit of an endorphin fix.

I'm making Chinese food for lunch today. A stir fry of turkey, red peppers, broccoli, onion, garlic, celery, cabbage, ginger and duck sauce, with spring rolls and brown rice. Lunch will be around 1. Don't be late.

Escaping Noise By Spending The Summer Solstice Afternoon At Miss Puerto Rico's

You are on Miss Puerto Rico's balcony, looking east, towards Dallas, on this first day of summer of 2010.

I believe the Summer Solstice occurred at something like 6:23 this morning. With the sun beginning its relentless march towards shorter days and winter.

I was in the pool, busy swimming, when the sun decided to head south. The thermometer in the pool, this morning, claimed the water temperature was 86. The air was 81.

In other words, we are at that time of the year when the water in the pool is not all that refreshing, in the cool you off department. But a shower using only cold water, now that is still a bit refreshing, though that water is getting warmer too.

The reason I am over at Miss Puerto Rico's, this afternoon, is because the noise from painter's power washing was getting on my nerves. It is really easy to get on my nerves.

So, I hauled my laptop over to Miss Puerto Rico's DSL connection. It may be really quiet here, but her computer chair is very uncomfortable. And her high maintenance cat, Tasha the Nazi, resents my presence. She likes to spend her day sleeping on this computer chair. So, I am being subjected to a lot of loud, scolding meows. And a few vicious hisses. So far the monster has not attacked me.

Today Tootsie Tonasket proposed that I become her houseboy. I don't see that happening. It would be way too much culture shock, going from the wilds of Texas to the wilds of remote Eastern Washington. Though the hill hiking out Tootsie's backdoor would be nice.

The Queen of Wink remains missing. Last I heard from the Queen was her announcement that she was conducting a Yoga Demonstration in downtown Wink on Friday morning. I worry that a Yoga Demonstration in downtown Wink might be an arrestable offense in West Texas.

The high today is still predicted to be 100. But I don't see that happening. It is past 4 and currently only 96.7, according to WeatherBug, with the Heat Index making it feel like 99.

Tomorrow is predicted to hit 100, too. And then a cold front moves in, lowering the high to 98 on Wednesday. Brrrr.

Feeling Peculiar With A Vixen Texan

Yesterday was an interesting Saturday, pretty much from the time I got out of bed.

Soon after swimming I was perplexed, on Facebook, to read of the vexations one of my Facebook Friends was having due to being confused about how she felt about the Peculiar boys, Joe and Moe.

Soon after being confounded by the Peculiar conundrum my sister called with the news about my Uncle Mel.

Awhile after that I was to learn that one of my Texas friends is in the throes of marital misery, to the extent that the one in marital misery is thinking of escaping by leaving the country. That is a pretty dire dose of misery.

And then I called another Texas friend, a sweet ol' good Texas girl. Or so I thought. Imagine my shock, when she told me that she is a Vixen. I was not quite certain what a Vixen was, but it sounded like it must be something shocking. I was driving at the time and thus unable to Google "Vixen."

Later, when I was back with Google access, I was to learn that a Vixen is a female fox. I have trouble remembering details. I am not quite certain why I was informed about the Vixen thing. I do remember that somehow, in the context, this information was shocking.

Shocking may be too strong a word. My vocabulary is lacking, so shocking is the best I can come up with.

I don't blog, usually, about what goes on after 5. Suffice to say that last night I had a penguin encounter, after hours, at the Fort Worth Zoo, among other encounters. I got back here, exhausted, around midnight. I've not stayed up that late since December 5 of 2008.

I'm hoping for a nice, peaceful, sedate Sunday. Though, Miss Puerto Rico did call me, really early, wanting to know why I'd not let her know Puerto Rico had had an earthquake. What am I? A personal news service?

I'm likely going over to Miss Puerto Rico's, later. That always turns into something. Latinas are such Drama Vixens.

A Foggy Fort Worth Wednesday

That is the foggy Fort Worth morning view from Miss Puerto Rico's balcony.

Miss Puerto Rico should now be off the island and waiting in Miami to get on a plane back to Texas. Unless complications have arisen due to the ongoing Haiti Crisis.

I am happy to have my cat caring duties over with.

It was 65 at midnight, 50 something when I went swimming this morning. The balmy temperatures have warmed up the water noticeably. Right now it is already 64, supposedly heading to a high of 75.

It is Wednesday, so I am heading north to Southlake in an hour, or so. I hope I don't have a tire go flat on me.

Tasha The Texas Devil Cat Hissed At Me Again Today

I dropped in on Miss Puerto Rico's cat on my way back from my daily constitutional, this time at Village Creek Natural Historic Area.

I think I've had cat sitting duty maybe 6 or 7 times. During the most recent previous cat sitting, back in October, the Devil Cat, Tasha, stopped hissing at me and threatening me with claws if I got too close.

This breakthrough came about due to Tasha, the Devil Cat, liking the treats I was giving her. She actually allowed me to pet her. Slightly. And if I didn't go find her upon entering her house, she'd come find me.

But, today, when I gave her her treats and slightly petted the top of her head, on the 3rd pet I got a huge hiss. I backed off.

The picture clearly shows Tasha the Devil Cat's evil eyes, along with her Hitleresque mustache.

I sat outside on the balcony for awhile, watching humanity pass by. When I came back in, the Devil Cat was where you see her in the first picture, glaring at me from behind her scratching post. I think she was wanting more of her special treats. She got no more. She shouldn't have hissed at me.

I called Miss Puerto Rico while I was sitting on her balcony. I had not heard from her and thought it might be a Haiti related phone service problem. But, the phones had had no problem. Apparently she'd called and left messages, which I did not see til I looked for them.

Speaking of phone calls. I got gas today so I called my mom in Phoenix and told her I got gas and how much it cost. After that we continued talking for way too long, til I got tired of holding the phone to my ear. My mom and dad are planning on coming to Texas again. Seems like they were just here, but it was slightly over a year ago.

Miss Puerto Rico Has Not Phoned Home To Texas Since Haiti Earthquake

That is the 4 in the afternoon view from Miss Puerto Rico's this 3rd Saturday of the New Year.

That is an ominous looking sky.

I don't think I am doing a very good job of cat sitting Miss Puerto Rico's cat, Tasha. The little beast doesn't seem to be eating.

I was instructed to give Tasha only 3, no more, of her special highly fattening treats. She eats those, so since she does not seem to be eating much out of her food bowl, I've been giving her more than the prescribed 3 units of the special fattening treat.

I have not heard from Miss Puerto Rico since her first day on the island. Puerto Rico is very close to Haiti. I have no idea if anything to do with Haiti is why Miss PR has been incommunicado.

Miss PR is back on the island to deal with some relative issues and had told me she would need to call every day to vent, so that the madness did not cause her a meltdown. I was not looking forward to those calls and likely would have let them go to voice mail.

On a totally unrelated subject that relates to today. I went swimming this morning, once more for the longest duration of the new year. That will likely continue to be the pattern until we go back into a Deep Freeze again.

The Travails Of Getting Miss Puerto Rico Out Of Texas

That is the sun going down view from Miss Puerto Rico's balcony, last night, looking north.

I was over at Miss Puerto Rico's to get my final cat care instructions. I don't know why I need to get the cat care instructions every time Miss Puerto Rico returns to her home island.

Although there was one slight variation this time. I am to give the cat no more than 3 special treats per day, due to the cat is fat and the treats are fattening.

My one longtime reader may remember that previously I would provide shuttle service to the airport for Miss Puerto Rico. But not this time.

My one longtime reader may remember the incident a couple years ago where Miss Puerto Rico got herself overly intoxicated, at the airport, was arrested and thrown into the airport jail.

I did not see Miss Puerto Rico for quite awhile after that incident. I have no empathy with someone needing to be alcohol medicated in order to fly. I can't imagine going through airport security tipsy. That's just nuts.

Anyway, Miss Puerto Rico called me before 5 this morning. I let it go to voice mail. I was afraid it was a last minute plea for me to provide airport shuttle service.

I listened to the message. She was all in a panic, thinking she was not going to make her flight. The shuttle had called and said they'd be 15 minutes late. Her flight time was 7:10. She had plenty of time.

Miss Puerto Rico called again, now on the shuttle, totally certain she'd be late. I told her, again, she had plenty of time. She was upset that the shuttle was going to pick up someone else and she had no idea where she was.

About 20 minutes later Miss Puerto Rico called again, all upset, sure she'd missed her flight. I look at the time and see it is well before 6. I tell her she's early. She tells me the airport is in a different time zone.

This was the point I realized why she was willing to pay $31 to get to the airport, rather than use my free shuttle service. It's because of my Zero Tolerance policy. Obviously Miss Puerto Rico was able to bring booze onboard the shuttle with her. And by the time she got to the airport she was drunk. Again.

I told her to go to the Check-in and all would be fine. She was all upset, thinking she might be able to fly stand-by, now that she missed her flight.

I told her, it is before 6, over an hour before your plane leaves. What? She muttered, confused. It's before 6, I repeated. You don't fly out for over an hour. She then said something about her clock being wrong and hung up.

About 20 minutes later Miss Puerto Rico calls again, all cheery, telling me she's through security and at her gate. I say something like, so there was nothing to get all upset about after all.

She acted as if the previous confused phone calls had not taken place.

Anyway, that's been my day so far. Up early, in the pool as the sun came up, fixed my web editor problem. All is well in my simple little world. Except I have a damn cat to attend to.

A Possible Incoming North Texas Blizzard & Fixing Puerto Rican Computers

That is the slightly before noon view from Miss Puerto Rico's balcony. She called me this morning with an urgent need for help. Her computer had ceased responding.

It took 3 minutes to bring the computer back to life. Then I took the picture you see here.

As you can see we are a bit overcast here in Fort Worth this first day of December. Earlier WeatherBug told me there was a chance of snow after midnight on Thursday. Which would be Friday morning.

I went to the library after leaving Miss Puerto Rico's. I needed a book. Or two. On the way there the local radio weather report had a chance of frozen precipitation happening as early as tomorrow, as in Wednesday.

We haven't even had a freeze yet and I'm tired of winter, which isn't even here for another 20 days. The furnace is running and I'm wearing sweat pants. Catching pneumonia is likely next on my agenda.

Also on my possible agenda is a meeting later today. I am embarrassed to admit I have a neurotic problem going to meetings in close quarters. Germ & Virus Phobia. All it takes is one cougher and I'm out of there. Or a sneezer. Or, God forbid, a combo cougher/sneezer.

And what if someone wants to hug me? That could cause me to faint. Especially if they hugged and coughed. Or sneezed.

The Wednesday Stormy Texas View From Miss Puerto Rico's Balcony

That is the stormy, 3 in the afternoon, Wednesday view from Miss Puerto Rico's balcony, in what may be the last in the current "View From Miss Puerto Rico's" series.

Miss PR called from the island today, confused about the flight info I'd printed up for her. She starts her trek back to Texas real early in the morning. I drew pickup duty at D/FW tomorrow around 3.

The last time I had pick up duty, when I arrived, Miss Puerto Rico was standing at the curb, outside the terminal, yapping on the phone. She did not notice me walk up and wheel off with her rolling luggage. About a minute later I heard screaming and a lot of fingers pointing my way from those who had seen the heist.

A lot of rain has fallen on us in North Texas today. I've not heard how the Haltom City collection of Fossil Creeks is doing during the flash floods. I heard from the Haltom City Flood Monitor early this morning, but not a peep since. This concerns me.

I was north of my current location during a bad part of the storm. I had to exit my vehicle and traverse unprotected ground for about 200 feet to reach shelter. I was pretty much drenched by the time I reached where the rain couldn't reach me.

But not as wet as I got this morning down at the pool. Just a few drops fell on my way to the water. Then a downpour started up about 10 minutes in. Usually I don't put back on my t-shirt after I get out of the water. This morning I did put it on, because I was shivering like a shaking leaf in a heavy wind. Shiver shaking is really good exercise. I don't recommend it, though. It's sort of an extreme sport.

I have not been a blogging maniac today. Except for blogging about Kieran the Scottish American and his Quiver invention. I learned after that blogging that Kieran's Quiver will be available for sale before Christmas.

In other Durango News of the day, someone named Aldo Singer asked me to be a guest blogger on CheapOair. It looks legit. I am unclear on why I would be motivated to do this.