Sunday, September 4, 2016

Wichita Mountain Blue Smurf With Elsie Hotpepper Sauerkraut Issues

This first Sunday morning of September I found myself having a conversation with Elsie Hotpepper regarding her reputation of being a relentless pestering nag.

After several nagging exchanges I informed Miss Hotpepper I was going incommunicado due to heading out to do some mountain climbing on Mount Wichita.

At Mount Wichita I chose the eastern route to the summit for my first ascent of the day.

Upon arrival at the summit I was sort of startled by the giant Blue Mountain Smurf  you see above.

After the Blue Mountain Smurf recovered from hyperventilating among that which he informed me was the reason he was so big was he was a body building weight lifter. The information came when I asked how he could manage something so strenuous as steep mountain climbing in HOT, well, in the 80s, temperatures, whilst wearing a hooded sweatshirt.

In the midst of talking to the Blue Mountain Smurf my phone made its incoming text noise. I yanked the phone from its pocket cage and quickly saw the text message was from the aforementioned Elsie Hotpepper, whom I had clearly told that I was going mountain climbing.

The message which Elsie Hotpepper texted was more perplexing and inscrutable than most perplexing and inscrutable Elsie Hotpepper messages...

I don't like sauerkraut, and I don't know who Kimchee is.

I was unable to parse the meaning of this message. Is it the Hotpepper answer to me asking why Elsie thought she was not a nag?

Way too convolutedly complicated for my simple thought processes to process.

I put the phone back in its pocket cage and began my first mountain descent of the day.


When I got back to ground level from my first mountain ascent of the day, I looked back towards the summit and saw the Blue Mountain Smurf chasing an even bigger mountain climber down the mountain. I do not think it is safe for that much bulk to be moving fast down a steep mountain. But, neither tripped whilst I was watching.

On my second ascent of the day I came upon a pair of roadrunners running. I was not quick enough with getting the phone out of its pocket cage to take a picture. I saw no coyote.

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