John McCain's Phone Call To Sarah Palin

Please excuse John McCain's inexcusable profanity in his phone call to Sarah Palin asking her to be his Vice-President.....

WaMu And Other Economic Disasters

Washington Mutual pulled out of Krogers, here in Texas, a couple years ago. This made the closest WaMu to me about 9 miles. The 18 mile roundtrip to deposit a check costs a gallon of gas. Something seems wrong about that.

I'd been noticing a new construction near my friendly neighborhood Super Wal-Mart. Last week it identified itself. It's a new WaMu branch. This is a good thing.

But, WaMu seems to be in trouble. When they pulled out of Krogers they were in trouble. And now those troubles have gotten way worse. So, I'll just assume this new WaMu won't get finished, so as to avoid anymore disappointment in my disappointment heavy life.

All these bad things happening to famous names like Merrill Lynch makes me nervous. I fear we are heading towards some bad bad times.

John McCain wants to assemble a commission to look into these vexing economic issues. Wasn't it a commission that recommended all that de-regulating that's led to the desperate situation we're now in? Wasn't John McCain part of a long ago bank type scandal? Something called the Keating Five. Or Fifteen. It's so hard to remember. I guess I could look it up.

At least Barack Obama seems to understand we've got some serious problems. Though I don't hear a lot of re-assuring solutions. Probably because there aren't any.

Texas Weight Loss, Tootsie Tonasket & Tacoma

I heard from Tootsie Tonasket this morning with a report on her weight loss success. Tootsie has been following my strict regimen for almost 6 months now. She has shrunk from 219 pounds to a new low of 158!

Tootsie's chronic back pains and joint aches have gotten way better, likely due to all the walking I have her do.

Tootsie Tonasket now weighs less than me. But I also have been continuing to shrink. Not that I mean to. I have shrivelled to a new low of 166.

I guess I need to eat more. But I eat a lot. Really I do.

When I was up in Tacoma, right from the start, I thought those people were in a conspiratorial plot to fatten me up. No matter how many times I said that I don't usually eat dinner, over and over and over again I was forced to eat dinner, lest I be charged with even more serious counts of being anti-social and ignoring and avoiding the house guests.

Cheesecake, a known weakness of mine, was brought into the house. And then, just to be cruel, even though it was well before its pull date, the cheesecake was tossed in the garbage. I was being double-binded, ying-yanged by these people. Pure torture.

Another one of my known weaknesses, potato chips, were always in supply. In various flavors.

There was a large supply of various alcoholic beverages in a wide variety, which I was encouraged, over and over again, to consume, at will, forget about the calories.

I lost count of the number of times I was brought to McDonald's. One of the times for the usual forced evening meal feeding, which, like I said, I rarely eat, where I was presented with a Filet-o-Fish, French Fries and a full sugar Coke. There was a lot of pressure to have a Hot Fudge Sundae, but this was one of the rare occasions when I successfully resisted. Likely because my pushily insistent little sister was not in attendance. Even though it was my Mom and Dad's Anniversary, she could not find the time to go to McDonald's with them. Shameful. Mom and Dad said they felt like my little sister was avoiding them. I meant to have a talk with her about that.

I was forced to consume other restaurant feedings in the evenings in Tacoma. Once at a seafood place called Steamers. It was good.

And then, as if to make one final attempt to fatten me up, on my last night in Tacoma, they insisted on taking me out to eat. What cuisine I was asked would I like? I defaulted to seafood and suggested a McDonald's Filet-o-Fish, which I really like.

No. McDonald's is out, I was told. Either Anthony's Homeport, Katie Down's or Duke's Chowder House. I'd been to both Anthony's and Katie Down's, so I opted for Duke's.

So, at Duke's, nothing was spared in the final attempt to fatten me up. I was ordered to order a cocktail. I opted for a Bloody Mary with 2 giant Prawns. Hot out of the oven Sourdough with butter was brought out. I was told to eat loaf after loaf.

By this point in time, during my month of brainwashing in Tacoma, I did what I was told.

And then the appetizers showed up. One was a delicious, filling crab concoction. The other was a lot of mussels in a broth in which you dipped rye bread.

I was stuffed by the time the appetizers were done. I was then told to order a beer.

I'm going to explode I feared. But I did as I was told.

And then the main course arrived. Halibut and French Fries. I had no option but to eat it all.

By the time I was done I was not able to walk easily. A wheelchair was provided to get me to the car.

I somehow made it back to my sister's without fainting and crawled up the stairs to my sleeping zone with the army cot in the HOT area they call the Tropics. After about an hour my sister came up the stairs with her final attempt to fatten me up. She'd made a giant Long Island Iced Tea out of some liquor remnants she'd found somewhere. Along with the remains of the giant potato chip bag from Costco.

I was able to eventually consume the Long Island Iced Tea. I then blogged a heavily censored version of the evening and then passed out. I did not touch the potato chips.

Despite their evil attempts to fatten me up, I did not gain any weight during my month of eating like a pig and drinking like a fish in Tacoma. When I think of all the money they wasted trying to put some meat on my bones, it just appalls me. All that cheese, all that meat, all that butter, all those desserts, all those bags of chips, all those bottles of wine and beer. All that could have fed a starving family in Africa for a year.

I guess I'll start having melted butter on my evening bowl of air popped corn and see if I can stop this continuing unnecessary weight loss. Or go buy some pants, jeans and shorts that fit me.

Topless Joint Upsets Some In My Fort Worth Neighborhood

I believe the Dallas/Fort Worth Metroplex has the world's highest per capita number of women working in strip clubs. There are dozens upon dozens of Strip Joints, also known as Gentlemen's Clubs, throughout this metro area.

Long ago I learned from a Texan, I'll anonymously call G the Texan, that going to a Strip Joint, with your dad, is a right of passage in Texas when you turn 18. G the Texan was shocked to learned no such thing exists in my former zone of Washington. Yes, there are a few topless joints up there, but not like what exists here in Texas.

I never went to a topless bar in Washington. I have gone to a strip show or two in British Columbia. There was always a good one at this place called Izzy's and at the PNE. That is the Pacific National Exhibition in Vancouver. The PNE is sort of like the State Fair of Texas on steroids. I don't know why they don't have a strip show at the State Fair of Texas. They do have a Women's Museum there.

Some people in my neighborhood of Fort Worth are in a tizzy due to a Strip Joint being built. This is to be across the Trinity River in a Dry Zone. One would think my side of the river would be the preferred location for a new Strip Joint, since I'm in a totally Wet Zone. I think across the river it is a totally Dry Zone, meaning, I don't think you could even carry your own bottle of beer into the new Strip Joint.

Maybe with a Strip Joint within walking distance I'll finally visit one. I'd ask G the Texan if he wanted to attend the grand opening, but I'm sure he's banned from such things now that he is married.

Video with details below....

Inexpensive, Effective, Noisy, Edible Smoke Detector

From Lulu, an inspired observer of the latest in Redneck Home Furnishings....

The Repo Man Strikes

Just when I think things can't get any worse. The Repo Man strikes.

Alma, my Sweet Songbird of the South, barely recovered from Hurricane Ike's various aggravations, got fresh, unnecessary aggravation yesterday.

Alma is down in Port Aransas, Texas. If you read my blog religiously, you already knew that.

The car she has been buying, that she needs for work, has had a major malfunction of late. That's why Alma's brother-in-law had to come get her off the island and away from any interaction with Ike.

Alma was slightly behind in her car payments on the car that did not run. Alma had communicated with her lender, who let her know they would work with her to get her back up to speed, so to speak.

And then, yesterday, Alma looks out her window to see no car. Her guitar and all her music stuff and other important things were in that car.

Alma ran out of her house and down the street and found the Repo Man stuck in the mud with her car in tow. She asked him to let her get her stuff. He told her she'd have to go to Corpus Christi to recover her possessions.

About then a Port Aransas cop, who Alma knew, showed up, assessed the situation, told the Repo Man that he made a mistake in not extending the courtesy of letting local law enforcement know he was going to take a car. The cop told Alma to get her stuff. The cop then drove Alma and her stuff back to her place.

In the meantime I'm thinking right now all these huge multi-billion dollar financial institutions, that have shafted who knows how many people, are now asking for bailouts from the Feds. While little people, like Alma, don't have that avenue of help. The Feds are not going to help Alma out with her car problem. Or the financial woes Ike caused her.

Who would order in a Repo Man days after a place is recovering from a hurricane? That just ain't right.

John McCain's Teleprompter Problems

In this video John McCain blames his nephew's incompetent handling of the teleprompter keyboard for his frequent miscues...scroll down the list to find the John McCain Teleprompter video. I could not seem to get the right embed code and instead it turned into some sort of entertainment news thing that started off with Britney Spears. I don't want Britney Spears on my blog...

Lulu Is Heading To Texas

Along with Lauri. Two of my favorite Southern Belles are heading to Texas in less than 2 weeks. These two call themselves Chippys. I am not sure, but I think a Chippy is someone who takes something someone else might have not seen as art and the Chippy turns it into something purty.

The Chippys are going to be down in Round Top for this twice a year event that's something like the biggest in the world for those who collect antiques and cool stuff that people make.

Again, I'm not totally certain, but I think this Round Top thing has gotten so big it has had to spread to surrounding towns in order to contain all the collectibles that find their way to Central Texas. Here is a website with Round Top/Antique Weekend info.

Now, Lulu and Lauri have some appreciation of my skills in regards to these type shows. They have made an excellent case (Jalapeno Margaritas) as to why I should show up there. Today I looked at how far it is from here, a bit less than 300 miles. I've driven to Austin easily in one day, Round Top isn't much further than Austin.

What makes this trek to Round Top sound appealing to me, besides the Chippys, is it is going somewhere different for once. That and Lulu and Lauri have mentioned this Jalapeno Margarita thing that sounds intriquing to me.

When I first heard of a Jalapeno Margarita I thought the ladies were teasing. So, I Googled it. There is a lot of Jalapeno Margarita info. Including recipes, even one from Fort Worth's renowned cowboy chef, Tim Love.

Here's the simplified way to make a Jalapeno Margarita.....

No. I'm not gonna say have the Chippys make one for you. Here's the recipe....

Ingredients

1 jalapeño, poked with a knife
1 1/3 cups tequila
1 cup orange liqueur
1 cup fresh lime juice (10 limes)
3 tablespoons superfine sugar
Kosher salt and ice

Directions

1. In a jar, steep the jalapeño and tequila; keep at room temperature for 3 days.

2. Strain the tequila into a large pitcher and discard the jalapeño. Stir in the orange liqueur, lime juice and sugar.

3. Pour the salt and a small amount of the margarita onto 2 rimmed plates. Dip the rims of 6 glasses into the margarita, then into the salt. Fill each glass with ice, pour in the margarita and serve.

Cheers! And here's to hoping to see some Chippys soon, down further south in the Round Top zone.

Clinton & Palin In 2012

Expert prognostiator that I am, always with an opinion, seldom correct, I am now going to make my prediction as to the outcome of the upcoming Presidential election. And the election of 2012.

I believe, come election day in November, the Obama-Biden ticket is going to lose to McCain-Palin.

McCain, being an old man, is only going to serve one term. The McCain presidency will be fairly popular with the people, much more so than the disgraced Bush presidency.

Sarah Palin will win the Republican presidential nomination in 2012.

Hillary Clinton will win the Democrat presidential nomination in 2012.

Hillary Clinton will beat Sarah Palin, to finally win the presidency, in the election of 2012. Making Hillary the first woman to be elected president.

One week before Hillary's inauguration John McCain will resign as President.

Making Sarah Palin, for one week, the first woman President of the United States.

Thus robbing Hillary of being the first female President, but still basking in the glory of being the first woman to be elected President of the United States.

Bill will take a cue from Sarah Palin's husband Todd and suggest that he be referred to as the First Dude.

Soon after they move into the White House, again, Hillary will announce she no longer needs the First Dude and is divorcing him.

Hillary's popularity ratings soar.

I forgot to mention, Hillary will pick Barack Obama as her Vice-President in 2012.

I doubt Hillary will re-marry.

The Dallas Trinity River Project

Dallas had a vision about the Trinty River before Fort Worth did. But Dallas does not call theirs a vision. It's just the Trinity River Project. The Dallas project will give Dallas a huge lake, some very cool bridges and a lot of new recreation areas. All in all, to me, the Dallas project makes way more sense than the Fort Worth project. That and the Dallas project will enhance an existing huge flood plain, not destroy existing good stuff, like the Fort Worth vision does. Let alone the dozens upon dozens of businesses dislocated by Fort Worth. You get a good look at the Dallas 'vision' in the video below.