Showing posts with label Mullet. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mullet. Show all posts

Friday, September 2, 2011

Feeling Guilty About Possibly Causing Gar The Texas Nerd Avoidable Misery

I was reading Gar the Nerd's latest Readerless Rambling about his many wives, which caused me to ponder how some little thing can lead to unanticipated results.

Before I get to unanticipated results I must ask how can Gar the Nerd's Ramblings be Readerless if I read them? That's at least one person reading, which renders the Ramblings not Readerless.

Done with the digressing.

So, a decade ago, give or take a year or two, when I first met Gar the Nerd, in person, he still went by the nickname Gar the Texan. Gar the Texan was the first person I'd ever met, in person, who had one of those infamous mullet hair-dos that went out of style sometime in the 1980s.

In the Pacific Northwest a Gar-like mullet was/is called a Pocatello-Doo. I assume because the population of Pocatello, Idaho had/has an unseemly number of mulletheads.

I don't quite remember how I brought the subject up, but I somehow verbalized my opinion to Gar the Texan regarding his embarrassing mullethead.

Soon after that Gar the Texan got a haircut more suited for the current century.

Soon after that Gar the Texan got a raise and a promotion and started being sent to Europe over and over again.

Eventually Gar the Texan met his most recent foreign wife. Now ex-wife. A German who I assume must have been extremely desperate for a Green Card.

At one point in time Gar the Texan told me he owed me big time for convincing him to lose the embarrassing mop. His boss had told him he would not have been sent overseas if he still looked like a clueless hick. His now ex-wife told Gar the Texan she would not have spoken to him if he still had the mullet.

So, that is what got me pondering. Like I said, at one point in time Gar the Texan told me he owed me big time for wising him up about his locks. Had I not done so his now ex-wife would never have talked to him, let alone marry him. Thus saving Gar the Texan from a lot of aggravation.

I guess losing the mullet did result in a lot of trips to Europe for Gar the Texan, which, I guess, is a good thing. Had his boss felt brave enough to send Gar the Texan to Europe whilst looking like a clueless hick, maybe Gar the Texan might have met a German girl who liked mulletheads, with that girl being his latest foreign wife, with that marriage working out and Gar the Texan living happily ever after with the final wife of his life.

So, now I'm feeling a bit guilty that I may have ruined Gar the Texan's life by convincing him to lose the mullet.

I sort of feel bad about this.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Gar the Texan's Ongoing Mullet Hair Denial Lunacy


The first time I met Gar the Texan in person was quite memorable, due to the fact that I'd never been up close to a Mullet Head before.

In the Pacific Northwest Mullet Heads, for the most part, were called Pocatello Do's. Or was it Poca-Do's? I don't remember. Pocatello is a town in Idaho known for being a bastion of the Mullet, back when it was popular with those who like silly looking hairstyles.

For some reason, Gar the Texan, with clock-like regularity posts a picture of himself in his Mullet Prime, knowing that someone is going to make mention of the Mullet, which he then denies the fact that it is a Mullet.

The latest iteration of this occurred yesterday on Facebook. Gar posted the infamous Mullet Picture, which caused someone named Jennifer to comment, "I must say...That is one b#tchin'* mullet..."

To which Gar the Texan made his predictable Mullet Denial comment.

To which a voice of reason commented, "Gar, I have lost track of the number of times I've told you if it looks like a mullet, it's a mullet. Why do you continue in mullet denial? It's not like you had the mullet in this century. Now, that would be embarrassing."

To which Gar the Texan commented, "I will be in Mullet denial forever."

And then the really weird thing happened.

Someone who lives way out in the West Texas Boonies, in Gar the Texan's old hometown of Kermit, came to a very irrational, albeit, scientific sounding defense of Gar's claim that he was not a Mullet Head.

The commenting Kermitite, Jyl, basically makes the case that Gar was a Feather Head, not a Mullet Head, commenting, "......and no, it's NOT a mullet..feathers? yes. Mullet? no. I can even explain the distinction to those of you who are either from the wrong region or decade to know the difference. A mullet (a.k.a. bi-level, has a perimeter that is disconnected just above, and slightly behind the ears, creating two different styles on one head. Short (business) in the front, and long (party) in the back... What Garland is sporting in this picture is more of a soft metal feathered look...pre-hair band, but still would have made Eddie Van Halen jealous. Quite beautiful, Garland. Perfectly executed feathers...kudos to you!"

I'm thinking it sounds worse to be a Feather Head than a Mullet Head.

At the top is a composite of 4 Mullet Heads. Gar the Texan is the Mullet on the left. The Mullet Head next to Gar is from the Wikipedia article about the serious Mullet Hair issue. The others were Mullets I found by Googling for Mullet Hair images. I picked ones that matched Gar the Texan's Mullet Feather Head.

An interesting quote from the Wikipedia Mullet Hair article...

"The mullet is a hairstyle that is often ridiculed as a lowbrow and unappealing hairstyle. The mullet began to appear in popular media in the 1960s and 1970s but did not become generally well-known until the early 1980s. It continued to be popular until the mid-1990s and has enjoyed a partial return to favor as a retro look in the 2000s."

Gar the Texan continued his Mullet Head well past the mid-1990s. Maybe when I first saw the Gar Mullet it was in retro look mode. It takes awhile for the news that a fad is now a dud makes its way inland to Texas, from the left and right coasts. An example of that is you still see a lot of idiots here in Texas wearing their pants down around their knees, exposing their underwear. I don't recollect ever seeing this particular example of bad taste on the left coast.

Below is a YouTube video celebrating the Mullet Nation. I don't think Gar the Texan is in the Mullet Nation video...