Thursday, February 14, 2008

Locked & Loaded

A couple nights ago at my local neighborhood Krogers, that's a grocery store for you who live in non-Krogers zones, an armed robber waved his gun and instructed the store's on-duty cop and all the customers in the self-checkout area to lay down on the floor, face down, with their hands behind their back. The robber forced an employee to open a safe. There was 50 dollars inside. Only 50 dollars. It was past midnight. The thief escaped into the night while all the victims ran out the back of the store, calling 911 as they ran. As of today, the armed robber remains at large.

So, last night, about 6, I took off to go to the aforementioned Krogers. And what was on my door but a warning in the form of a piece of paper. We have a Neighborhood Watch System here. The notice said, in part:

"Dear Residents,
This letter is to notify you of criminal activity that has been reported in the immediate area. Two unknown young black males dressed in dark hoodies are approaching people with a black gun & yellow pistol grips demanding wallets, cash, jewelry, cell phones or anything of value. They approach the victims while they are on foot, walking from a car to a breezeway while walking alone. The criminal activity has been reported on Oakland Hills Drive, Ederville Road, Brentwood Stair Road, Boca Raton Blvd. and Pacific Place."

Let's see, I live on Boca Raton, Brentwood Stair Road is where I had a flat tire a couple weeks ago, in a bad neighborhood, Oakland Hills Drive is the road I took to Oakland Hills Park yesterday, I'm looking at Ederville Road from my window.

Basically I am doomed.

So it was quite fortuitous that today's Fort Worth Star-Telegram's sports page had an ad that touted "Cheaper Than Dirt" firearms. Among the guns on sale at the dirt cheap prices are an AK 47 assault rifle and a Thompson 1927A, that's a "Tommy Gun" to you non-gun aficionados, you know a machine gun like gangsters used back in the Prohibition years. With this being an area of the United States where many remnants of Prohibition are still in place I guess it makes sense to be selling "Tommy Guns" to people. At "Dirt Cheap" prices.

I can't wait to get me one.

2 comments:

Dimensio said...

Your statements regarding the "Tommy Gun" are not accurate. The advertisement shows a "Thompson 1927A1", which is a semi-automatic firearm that cosmetically resembles the classic Thompson M1A1, and not the iconic "Thompson Submachinegun". As a semi-automatic firearm, it will only fire one round for each pull of the trigger and, as such, it cannot be classified as a "machinegun" either by technical or by legal standards.

A fully automatic Thompson submachinegun, of any model, would cost a minimum of $20,000 in addition to a $200 federal tax stamp. While of great interest to collectors, they are not commonly available from most licensed firearms dealers.

Durango said...

Thanks for the machine gun lesson. I guess I won't be getting a Tommy Gun now.