George Carlin Dead at 71

I've always found George Carlin very very amusing. I was surprised to learn, this morning, that he died Sunday. It doesn't seem a week goes by lately without some well known person dying, announcing they've got cancer or suffering a relapse requiring re-hab.

Below is a video of George Carlin taking on religion. In a very sacri-religious way. Is there any other way to take on religion?

Fort Trinity Trail Again, Plus Video

About noon I slowly coasted to my nearest gas station and pumped half a gallon into my nearly dry van. And then for the 3rd Sunday in a row I burned up half that half gallon driving to Gateway Park to bike the Trinity Trail to the Stockyards zone.

It was not windy today. That was nice. I had a huge surprise this time on the Trinity Trail. I have never seen so many bikers on this trail as I saw today. And it was the hot part of the day. I'm talking dozens. Usually I see none. I even saw non-homeless people walking the trail. When I finished my ride I even had a couple drive up to me and ask how to get to the Trinity Trail. That's definitely never happened before. I showed them how to go the scenic route. Or the shortcut. They took the shortcut.

Of course, self-deluded person that I am, attribute this sudden increase in bikers to being caused by my having blogged about it, in addition to being so earnestly trying to get Fort Worthers off their collective butts and work on getting Fort Worth off the Top 20 of those Most Obese Cities Lists. I feel I am making progress. Slow, but steady.

Here are a pair of videos showing what it's like to bike on the Trinity Trail. In the first video we start about a mile north of downtown, heading south towards downtown. We cross under the Main Street Bridge, that I've mentioned before. And then we cross another bridge to get to the other side of the Trinity River. The second video continues from that point.



The second video goes through the busiest part of the Trinty Trail, that being the part that runs from downtown through Trinity Park.

Six Flags Over Texas Anyone?

Anyone in the mood to stomach the stomach churning roller coasters at Six Flags?

I've got 4 free passes and no strong urge to use them. Actually, they're not really free. The free passes don't cover the cost of getting to Six Flags or parking there.

I've only been to Six Flags twice, both times very very very hot. The first time I got soaking wet on some Wild Rapids ride that had killed someone the year before. I did not realize I was going to be going under a waterfall. You would think this would be refreshing to get all wet when it's 110 in the shade. But it's not.

When you get all wet and it's superhot the natural human response is to take off your shirt. But at Six Flags Over Texas there are signs forbidding this sensible practice. I cared more about my comfort, than a sign, and figured if being shirtless got me both comfy and kicked out of Six Flags, the way I was feeling right then, that would have been a win-win.

Sadly, no one told me to put my shirt back on. After an hour of sitting and drying I was good to go. With my shirt back on. Why does Six Flags Over Texas insist shirts be worn? While on the opposite side of the freeway at Six Flag's Hurricane Harbor shirts are not required? You don't even have to wear shoes at that park. It's perplexing and vexing.

Australia Overtakes America's #1 Position

I am in some sort of state of minor shock. For weeks I have been imploring Americans to draw down on our National Strategic Fat Preserve in order to cut food costs and shrink waist lines. And for aesthetic reasons.

I bragged about how we Americans have such an advantage over other nations in this strategic area, with us Americans collectively storing billions of dollars worth of food in our personal Fat Banks.

And, so, what do I learn on this last day of Spring? Australia, of all places, has passed us Americans as the fattest people on earth. How could this happen? I think of Aussies as being like west coasters, a fit and trim people with plenty of health nuts.

26% of Australians are obese. Only 25% of Americans are obese. With a population of 300 million, that's 75 million obese Americans. Australia's population is only about 20.5 million. That's even less people than Canada and California. With 20.5 million people, and 26% of them obese, Australia only has 5.33 million obese people compared to America's whopping 75 million.

So, though we may no longer be #1 in the percentage of our people who are obese, America is still proudly #1 in total number of obese people and in the amount of calories stored in our collective National Strategic Fat Preserve.

F**king an Austrian Village

Due to its name being the same as an infamous English language vulgarity, a town in Austria was so vexed at the expense of having to replace all the Fucking town signs over and over again, due to tourists wanting souvenirs, that, in 2004, the Fucking residents voted on whether to change the town's name from Fucking. They voted to keep Fucking. And anchor the signs in heavy cement.

I'm thinking, geez, why not just sell some Fucking signs in your town's souvenir stores. And if you don't have any souvenir stores, open some and sell the Fucking signs.

Now, I never use this particular vulgarity, or any vulgarity for that matter. So, please note my use of that word above was in its noun form, that being the name of that Fucking town in Austria.

From Wikipedia: "Fucking is an Austrian village in the municipality of Tarsdorf, in the Innviertel region of western Upper Austria. The village is located 33 kilometres north of Salzburg, four kilometres east of the German border and half an hour by car from the town of Petting, in Bavaria. The name of the village resembles a swear word in English, although it is pronounced differently ("Fook-ing")."

Now, with Wikipedia you can look up that same word and get details on its vulgar meaning, as well as its Austrian meaning.

If I ever visit Austria, I've no inclination to seek out a Fucking sign to take home.

Texas likes to name towns after European towns, like Paris and Athens. I wonder why there is no Fucking in Texas?

Texas Executions

I can think of only one or two things for which Texas is #1 in the nation. One is most litter generated per capita. With the other being that, by a large margin, Texas leads the nation in number of executions. Texas is working hard to become the most obese state in the nation, but has a ways to go to catch up with Mississippi.

There had been a moratorium on executions that was only lifted a few months ago. Since then the most recent person to have a date with the executioner, at the last minute, had his death postponed for at least a month.

Why?

Well, a man named Charles Dean Hood was given the death penalty for the murders of Ronald Williamson and Traice Lynn Wallace. That was 18 years ago when the murderer was only 20.

The prosecutor in the case was Tom O'Connell. The judge was Verla Sue Holland.

Turns out the judge and the prosecutor were doing some heavy duty hanky panky whoopee making during Charle Dean Hood's trial. Apparently this violates all sorts of ethical standards and undermines the integrity of the court.

That the judge and the prosecutor were having an affair was known by Hood's lawyers during the trial. They did not bring this up, back then, because they knew they had to argue other cases in front of the same judge and did not want to make her mad.

So, as the time ticked down for the lethal drip to begin flowing into Hood, legal maneuvering ran amok. Til the time designated by the death warrant ran out, giving Hood at least a 30 day reprieve, during which it will be argued, some more, that he did not get a fair trial before an impartial justice system. Which seems sort of true when the judge who makes the rulings is canoodling with one of the lawyers arguing a case before her.

Seems like a no-brainer. New trial, new conviction, 18 more years on death row. Then execute the guy. If he's guilty.

Texas has so many executions the state needs an execution information center. Go here to visit the Texas Execution Information Center.

Tattoo Granny

Okay. I will admit I am like a very stodgy old codger about some things. Like guys wearing pants hanging half way to their knees, showing off their underwear, or lack of underwear. I don't get why anyone would want to have their body pierced and stick metal through the hole, except for, maybe, one hole in each ear. And no holes in male ears.

But the thing people do to themselves that vexes me the most is tattoos. Why anyone would want to do this to themselves I do not remotely understand. To me they don't look good in any way, they are like having a stain on your skin, like some sort of hideous birthmark.

So, there is this grandma who lives in Irving. Irving is where the Dallas Cowboys currently play football. This grandma is 62 years old. She prefers to go by the name of Miss Dixie. Miss Dixie got her first tattoo when she was 47. She got that first tattoo at the suggestion of a friend who told Miss Dixie it'd give her something to remind her of her mother who was dying from cancer. So, Miss Dixie got her first tattoo.

And now, 15 years later, Miss Dixie is covered with moons, suns, stars, angels, eyes and who knows what else. Miss Dixie goes to her tattoo parlor of choice about once a week for touch-ups or a new tattoo. Miss Dixie considers getting tattoos a form of therapy that works better for her than regular type therapy. Or meds.

Miss Dixie claims she's never heard a negative word about her tattoos, only compliments. And her grandkids think she is very cool with all her tattoos.

Like I said, I'm a stodgy codger. I don't think all those tattoos are cool. And I don't think this sets a very good example for Miss Dixie's grandkids. I think Miss Dixie should explore some new types of therapy and maybe try some different meds. Maybe Miss Dixie is addicted to pain. If needles are the thrill, perhaps acupuncture might fill the need, without all that nasty skin staining.

Destination Fort Worth Trinity Uptown Project

There were a couple of interesting, amusing letters to the editor in today's Saturday edition of the Fort Worth Star-Telegram. One was from a reader who, like me, thinks there are some blind spots in Fort Worth's Trinity River Vision Project. The other letter is from a Fort Worth native who feels Fort Worth gets slighted by airports.

First the letter about the Trinity Uptown Project------

FOCUS ON ... The ‘losers’ in Trinity Uptown project

The Army Corps of Engineers can fix the Trinity River flood problem, beautify the river and make it more accessible for $10 million.

The $576 million plan pushed by U.S. Rep. Kay Granger, R-Fort Worth, called the Trinity River Vision, displaces rightful landowners by using eminent domain in the name of private development.

This isn’t only unlimited government — it’s anti-conservative and anti-American. It does not matter if the streets are paved with gold and chocolate is in the water fountains. What’s wrong is wrong. It’s socialism on display.

Jim Oliver, general manager of the Tarrant Regional Water District and head cheerleader for the “vision,” says: “It’s like in any other major public works project. You have a few losers and a lot of winners.” This coming from the guy who hired the congresswoman’s son without interviewing anyone.

If this project is about economic development, why should there be any “losers”? How many of the “partners” in the Trinity River Vision are taking that role at a loss?

This is a new, bold vision? I have to admit that they make it look pretty exciting! They thought of everything — except the rights and well-being of 89 “losers.”

And given the use of eminent domain, there’s nothing new or bold about this “public-private” partnership.

We should expect better from “visionaries.”

— Brad Williams, Omaha Surplus, Fort Worth

And then there was a letter from a guy in Grapevine------

Destination Fort Worth

As my wife and I were leaving Las Vegas recently to fly back to Dallas/Fort Worth Airport, the American Airlines gate agent announced four times that our destination was “Dallas.”

I told her that I was going to Fort Worth. The airport’s name contains “Fort Worth,” and the airline’s headquarters is in Fort Worth. I asked her if she could mention Fort Worth sometime.

The next announcement referred to “Dallas-Fort Worth.” A few minutes later, she slipped into her old routine and dropped “Fort Worth.” I asked her again, and she told me that in the past three years I was the only person to ask her about Fort Worth.

Fort Worth can’t seem to get the recognition it deserves.

— Ed Rhodes, Grapevine

Durango Texas talking---Well, regarding taking umbrage at Fort Worth's name not being mentioned during boarding gate announcements. I frequently fly up to Sea-Tac. That's the nickname for Seattle/Tacoma International Airport. Just like Fort Worth, Tacoma shares the airport's name with a bigger, more well known neighbor. Unlike Fort Worth, Tacoma does not evidence a civic inferiority complex regarding Seattle in the way Fort Worth does regarding Dallas. Sea-Tac is located in neither Seattle or Tacoma. When the plane lands, if memory serves, the pilot welcomes you to Seattle. I highly doubt any Tacomaite has ever taken umbrage over this. Or imagined it to be a slighting of Tacoma. Or evidence that Tacoma does not get the recognition it deserves. Go here to visit a webpage of mine where I have some examples of what I think of as Fort Worth's Dallas fixation and how this is particularly troubling due to the well known fact that Fort Worth makes the World Green With Envy.

Where the Hell is Matt?

Seattle Matt's latest YouTube video has only been up 12 hours and it's already a hit. 14 months in the making, 42 countries with a cast of thousands. I wanna be Matt..... You can watch this extremely well done video here, or go here and watch it in high defintion. Just choose the "watch in high quality" option and click the full screen button.

Fort Worth Woman Dead from Traffic Ticket

A piece of local news bothered me yesterday. A 35 year old Dallas woman, Adrienne Lemons, mother of a 3 year old boy, was thrown into a Fort Worth jail because she had a couple traffic tickets she'd not taken care of.

From what I read it seems she was thrown in jail prior to having a hearing in court. The hearing in court was pending, when on the 10th day of her incarceration over traffic tickets, Ms. Lemons died, due to a staph infection, for which jailer would not give her her antibiotics.

At some point during her 10 day incarceration, due to traffic tickets, the pain from her staph infection became so intense she threatened to kill herself rather than endure the pain. Rather than getting her the treatment she needed, she was thrown into a solitary cell in the downtown Fort Worth Jail.

In solitary, Ms. Lemons condition became so grave she was rushed to the locally notorious John Peter Smith Hospital, where doctors decided her condition was so far gone there was nothing they could do. She died a few hours later.

Her family is in shock. Her brother has been the family's spokesperson. I'm hoping they find a very very very good lawyer.

I know someone here in Fort Worth who currently has two warrants for his arrest due to getting a ticket for not having car inspection sticker up to date. When he realized his mistake he fixed it that day, went to the courthouse to show that it was fixed and was met with confusing language from persons for whom English was not their first language. He walked away thinking the matter was taken care of.

Then 4 years later the notifications of his pending arrest arrived in the mail, not by registered mail, so there is no record of him actually getting these notifications.

Now, I'm thinking, elsewhere in the country, it is unlikely you could be arrested and thrown in jail over this. But, here in Texas, it seems common sense does not always rule. Or fairness. Because, apparently you can be thrown in jail prior to being convicted of anything. Now, I know that's the case for serious crimes, like murder, or bank robbing. Of course you put the perp behind bars prior to trial.

But for a traffic ticket? That is nuts. Totally nuts.