Sunday, November 27, 2016

The Aging Mystery Of Wichita Falls Mary Contrary

 A couple weeks ago Mary Contrary of Wichita Falls, not to be confused with Mary Not Contrary of Fort Worth, posted on Facebook the results of a scientific analysis which indicated when Mary Contrary's Mental Age, Emotional Age and how old she Appears were averaged, Mary Contrary was determined to be 94.

Many were surprised to learn how old Mary Contrary is, including Mary Contrary.

Then, on Saturday, as in yesterday, another Facebook Scientific Analysis determined that Mary Contrary would perish in a bull fight at Age 95.

Concerned she only had one year to live Mary Contrary re-took the Facebook Scientific Age Analysis to find herself shocked to learn, as you can see above, that in the past couple weeks Mary Contrary has aged seven years.

With Mary Contrary now scientifically determined to be 102 I was starting to have some doubts about the scientific validity of this Facebook analysis.

So, I decided to submit myself to the Facebook Scientific Age Analysis.


Well, imagine my shock and surprise when I got the results of the Facebook Scientific Age Analysis and found them to be uncannily accurate.

I guess this means that Mary Contrary likely actually is a centenarian. I must say, just judging from Mary Contrary's appearance, she really does not look as old as the Facebook Scientific Age Analysis indicates she is....

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