Thursday, December 1, 2011

Up Early The Cold First Day Of December After A Night Of Nightmares With A Super Duper Uber Cougar

I am looking through the bars of my patio prison cell at a cool pool currently being chilled to 41 degrees on Day #1 of December.

24 shopping days til Christmas. 30 days til New Year's Eve. And then it will be 2012, the year the Mayan calendar comes to an end, which has the superstitious Miss Puerto Rico, and other simple souls, thinking the world is also coming to an end in 2012.

I had a very rough night's sleep. Again with nightmares, just as I feared. And once again the worst of the nightmares involved lunch with J.D. Granger.

In last night's nightmare J.D. met me at the Love Shack in the Fort Worth Stockyards for Dirty Love Burgers and big mugs of Whiskey Lemonade. In the nightmare J.D. insisted he wanted me to run a Gentlemen's Club that he was going to have the Trinity River Vision build for me on the banks of the Trinity River.

I told J.D. that Gentlemen's Clubs make me nervous. J.D. said they made him nervous too.

After discussing my TRV sweetheart deal we walked across the street to the Stockyards Hotel. That blonde Shanna lady, who met J.D. and me in the previous night's nightmare, was there in the lobby.

Next thing I know I'm at the door of the Bonnie & Clyde room of the Stockyards Hotel.

In non-nightmare, real world, I don't know if there is a Bonnie & Clyde room in the Stockyards Hotel. But, I am fairly certain Bonnie & Clyde stayed overnight there.

So, in the nightmare I'd lost J.D. and Shanna in the lobby. I open the door of the Bonnie & Clyde room to find myself in a Mrs. Robinson situation, like I'd seen on Two and a Half Men where the Ashton Kutcher character, Wendell, found himself getting way too familiar with the Super Duper Uber Cougar, Alan and Dead Charlie's mom.

Only in this case when I opened the door of the Bonnie & Clyde room it was not Alan and Dead Charlie's mom waiting for me, it was that well known Super Duper Uber Cougar mother of J.D. Granger.

Kay.

I let out a shriek, waking up in a cold sweat.

I am going to be scared to go to bed tonight.

2 comments:

  1. With that "cougar" in the title, I feared you were going to mention poor, dead Mike Leach!

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  2. I don't know if you will post this or not. Mama Granger draws a lot of water in Fort Worth. You and I do not.

    Houston Chronicle 1992:

    Mayor's son arrested

    The 20-year-old son of Fort Worth Mayor Kay Granger has been arrested on suspicion of breaking into an antique shop and stealing a Persian rug.

    Brandon Keith Granger was held for several hours in the Tarrant County Jail last week before posting bond of $2,750, records show.

    Dean Granger, the mayor's ex-husband, bailed his son out of jail, the Fort Worth Star-Telegram reported.

    Brandon Granger was arrested near the antique shop about 7 a.m. last Sunday after a newspaper carrier spotted a man breaking a window and wandering around inside.

    The store's owner later identified an $895 hallway rug found in Granger's pickup as missing from the store.

    Brandon Granger, who was a student at the University of North Texas this spring, lives with his father in Aledo.

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