Cleaning Viruses from this House

Well. I've had me a day. It started off with an alarming alarm bringing all sorts of mayhem.

My penance for setting off the security alarm was a large load of very hard tasks. I had to vacuum all 3 floors of this place. A daunting task. I've no idea when the last time this place was vacuumed before today.

The vacuum has a red light/green light thing that lets you know when you've sufficiently vacuumed an area. Sometimes it seemed like it took 10 minutes to get the green light in especially vacuum-needy areas.

After about 4 hours of heavy duty vacuuming I thought I was done. But then I was told I also had to vacuum the stairs. This involved a 20 foot vacuuming extension thing.

After the vacuuming I was given something called a Swiffer, or something like that, to mop the wood floors with. It was a daunting task.

And then I was given wet paper towels and told to dust all surfaces. This took another couple hours. I believe I cleaned areas that had not been cleaned before.

And then I was given a toothbrush and cleaning solution to scrub all the light switch fixtures. That was really too much.

After all that cleaning I went to my Tropical Zone to eat a couple potato chips with catsup. And then I was ordered to mow the lawn. I did not get to use the power mower. I had to use the old-fashioned push mower that I think they got from a garage sale.

Finally I had paid my debt to the local society and was allowed to go up to my computer to do something constructive. A few minutes later I did something totally destructive. I clicked on an MSNBC Breaking News Alert. This was a spam thing. This quickly spun out of control. By the time I realized I'd been attacked it was too late. I hit the power down button, but not quick enough.

When I re-started the computer all was well, for about a minute. Then the screen went blue with a message at the center telling me that a virus had been detected and I needed to run a virus scan.

This was a scam to get me to buy some Russian/Ukrainian's bogus anti-virus program. Basically it's a hold a gun to your head and pay up or you ain't gonna have control of your computer again type thing.

Six hours later, I think I have things back working. I think.

While I was trying to get this working again I was summoned downstairs again by my taskmaster sister. This time to have the tastiest cedar plank BBQed salmon I've ever had, along with a very very good salad and a dessert from heaven in the form of grilled peaches with toasted coconut and vanilla bean ice cream.

I came back up here about a half hour later and a half hour after that I think I have this back working right again. I hope.

I hate computers and all they put us through. And the evil people who do evil deeds with their computers. Bad boys.