Thursday, July 10, 2008

Bravo's Sheer Genius Sheer Weirdness

Last night I was in the mood for doing nothing. So, I popped a bowl of popcorn, turned on the TV and found it already on the Bravo channel, due to having watched Flipping Out the night before. Sheer Genius was already a few minutes into the show. About hair cutters. This can not be at all entertaining I thought. I was wrong.

My local disinformation purveyor, the Fort Worth Star-Telegram, has made mention multiple times of 2 local guys being on this show. One, named Matthew, from Dallas, one named Daniel, according to the Star-Telegram, from Fort Worth, but according to Bravo, from Dallas.

Of course, it may be possible that Daniel is from Fort Worth. When I'm on a road trip, or back in the northwest, I say I'm from Dallas, because few people know where Fort Worth is. It's like when I lived in the northwest and I was on a road trip, when asked where I was from, I'd say Seattle, because no one would know of my actual hometown of Mount Vernon. When people here, in Texas, ask where I'm from, I usually say Seattle.

Sheer Genius is similar in format to another Bravo show, Top Chef. Instead of a Quick Fire, Sheer Genius does a Quick Cut. Whoever wins the Quick Cut gets an advantage in the Elimination Challenge.

The first episode of Sheer Genius last night was a re-run of last week's show. In that re-run, the guy the Star-Telegram thinks is from Fort Worth was over the top stereotypical not a guy who likes girls. He went all emotional when he realized their challenge was to do the hair of people on another Bravo show, The Real Housewives of Orange County. Apparently Daniel was a rabid fan of this housewife show. I've not seen it. Most of the haircutters had.

Later in the show, or was it the next hour, Daniel said he got so excited over the OC women, that he wet himself. If such a thing happened to me, which it wouldn't, I would not be telling a TV camera about it. He also let it be known that when a person on the OC show got married, that he had a wedding party, where the guests came dressed for a wedding and celebrated. Another Sheer Genius person, a girl, said if she'd did something that embarrassingly weird she wouldn't be telling people about it.

At the Elimination part of this episode, Daniel had an emotional crying breakdown upset and collapse to the floor at one point during the booting process. The proceedings had to come to a halt while ex-Charlie's Angel, Jacyln Smith inquired if Daniel was all right. By the way, Jacyln Smith has held up really well. She looked like she could easily still be an Angel.

The other Texas guy, Matthew, won the Quick Cut in the second episode. This upset the others, because they did not like him. Apparently Matthew is quite socially inept, grating and constantly bitching and saying things that are offputting or make no sense. I thought, welcome to Texas.

Matthew's advantage in winning was he got to pick the first dress in that episode's Elimination Challenge. And then pick who got to pick next. And on til all the dresses were gone. The dresses went on models on whom the hair cutters had to make their hair red carpet worthy. Whatever that means.

Matthew over and over and over again mentioned his wife. How much he loved her, and she him, how he missed her, how he didn't need to relate to these juvenile fellow hair cutters, because he has a wife back home. When he picked his dress he said something like I'm picking one for my wife, to which the Germanic Colonel Klink on Hogan's Heroes in a supermodel's body type guy, named Rene Fris, said "Your wife's not here." It seemed like everyone was sick of hearing about this Matthew guy's wife.

I thought all the wife talk was typical reality show editing, foreshadowing that Matthew would get the boot. But he has immunity, I thought, because he won that Quick Cut Challenge. That's how it works on Top Chef.

So, Daniel, the other Texas guy, was all worried that he'd wet himself again, because he was sure that since this was a red carpet thing, there'd be a celebrity there. There wasn't. At one point, Daniel excitedly said this was just way too much excitement for a Texas boy, seeing all these famous people.

We see the haircutters work on their red carpet girls, then the girls go down the red carpet in front of the judges, including someone I've never heard of from some soap opera I've never heard of. But Daniel from Texas had. He was so excited.

And then the judging occurred. I thought Matthew was safe from getting booted, but no, you are safe from the next week's boot if you win the previous week's elimination. So, Matthew was in the bottom three and got the boot due to not listening to his model tell him that her hair would not hold a curl, so his red carpet hair was a disaster.

Matthew did not mind getting the boot. Once more he told everyone how happy he was to be going home to his wonderful wife and friends in Texas. We cut to another hair cutter who said something like, "That damn wife of his must be one wild cat in bed."

I likely will not be watching this next week. I will watch Bravo again tonight, unless I forget, to watch Kathy Griffin's Life on the D-List. She's funny.

One of the judges on Sheer Genius is some, apparently, well known hair guy I've never heard of named Kim Vo. He is one odd looking guy. Constantly with a really goofy grin. Below is a video of this Kim Vo guy getting interviewed after he'd been in Britney Spear's house fixing her hair.

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