Rat Dog Dick

Last night after suffering through American Idol I got to the end of Jack Olsen's true crime book, "Hastened to the Grave: The Gypsy Murder Investigation". This was a very interesting true crime book in that it seemed more like a novel than non-fiction, what with the main character being this femme fatale detective named Fay Faron who runs a detective agency with her dreadlocked dog, Bean, called the Rat Dog Dick Detective Agency. Now, there is a strange personal note here. My eldest sister has 2 dogs, one is called Rosie the Rat Dog and the other is named Bean. But my sister is no femme fatale so the eerie coincidences don't go beyond similar names.

Oh oh. I thought of another similarity between this book and my sister.

This book was about Gypsies taking advantage of elderly people and getting the old folks to put the Gypsies in their wills, or sign over their houses or their investments, like stocks and bonds and properties. Murder was also involved. Now my sister has never taken advantage of anyone, but she did manage to get involved with an elderly person. Or two. And somehow inherited all sorts of things. Cars, houses, property, bonds, cash. I am almost 100% certain my sister is not a Gypsy.

Now that I'm thinking about it I've got another acquaintance who made a minor sideline out of being the last surviving member of her clan and thus inheriting all sorts of things; money, houses, property, bonds, bank accounts, furniture, chickens, cars, cows and who knows what else. Sadly, this acquaintance slowly squandered all her ill-gotten gains, except for the cows, and now survives as a modern day junk collector/peddler. Yikes. That almost sounds like she's a Gypsy. She does sort of dress like a Gypsy, with colorful big skirts and garish jewelry and a fascination for the supernatural.

Anyway, Fay Faron and her Rat Dog Dick Detective Agency finally got the police to put an end to the Gypsie's reign of elder abuse. Incidentally, these Gypsie's were from the same branch of the Gypsy Mafia tree as the ones portrayed in the movie King of the Gypsies.

Fay Faron was so appalled by the lack of protection of the elderly from predators that she formed another agency called Elder Angels tasked with investigating financial crimes against the elderly.