Sunday, August 8, 2010

Texas Turned Me Into An African-American Female

I am almost 100% certain that I've mentioned previously that when I got my first Texas driver's license that the State of Texas turned me into a female.

I was quite a few months into my Texas exile when I finally got around to getting a Texas driver's license. Well, more than a few months, more like a year.

I arrived in Texas about a week before Christmas, a year later I had to make a winter return to Washington, via car. I was getting ready to go roller blading at Bear Creek Park in Keller when I opened the envelope containing my new driver's license. I looked at it, all seemed fine, til I saw the part that said SEX: F.

At first I feared this meant I'd failed sex, some obscure part of the bizarre Texas driving test that I'd not made note of. But then it was fairly obvious to me that whoever filled out my info took a look at me and mistook my girly looks for being a girl. And labeled me an "F".

This would have been no big deal, except for the fact I was taking off in the morning on a roadtrip to Washington. This new driver's license could make a cop stop interesting. But, since I really do not get stopped very often, I was not too concerned.

I would have been a tad more concerned had I known what I was to learn upon my return, when I went to the Texas driver's license place to straighten out the mess. There the license lady looked up my record and asked me to lean forward so she could whisper, "it says here you are African-American, you aren't are you?"

I was fairly certain I was not African-American, so I said no. I did not know that they put "extra" info on your record that does not show up on your license. For all I know I am still African-American on my Texas license record. This could possibly explain the Fort Worth cop's surly attitude when he gave me a ticket (thrown out) for driving without wearing a seatbelt.

The nice Texas driver's license lady let me keep the driver's license that gave me a sex change, after she snipped off a corner. I don't know why she had to do that.

I managed to drive to Washington, and back, without a cop incident where I had to explain why I was acting like a male when my license clearly indicates I'm a female.

In Washington I got a big party benefit due to my Texas license giving me girl cred. I was staying at my sister's in Kent. She was having an all-girl Christmas Party. With 30 or 40 girls. I was allowed to stay for the party if I acted as the greeter, showing my Texas driver's license to prove my bonafides as a legit attendee at an all-girl party.

It was a fun party. I think some of those girls were confused and were acting real nice to me because they felt sorry for me for being such a homely girl with an unfortunately ungirly sounding voice.

4 comments:

Steve A said...

And now you know why they drive the way they do around here!

Don Young said...

Your case is exactly like an episode of King of the Hill where Hank is alarmed to find his TX license listing him as a Female. Check it out. One of the best ones.

Sarah R said...

Seems fair. According to the Washington State I am male. I didn't catch the mistake until more than 15 years later. In that time I have been stopped several times and not a policeman has noticed either. I figure it's like voting, we just cancel each other out.

Durango said...

Sarah R, where you a pretty boy during our 15 years of being the opposite sex?