Friday, August 20, 2010

Chase Bank Fun Walking The Mean Streets Of Pantego Because My Vehicle Was Held For Ransom By Iranians

The sign is a warning in Pantego's Bicentennial Park. All suspicious persons are immediately reported. Can't say I was not warned.

So, how did I end up in the Pantego Park? Well. I needed to drop in on a location in Pantego on website related business.

Big Ed needed to be in Arlington on non website related business. Big Ed needed a Big Favor done. I agreed to do the Big Ed Big Favor if he'd take my vehicle in for its emissions test and an oil change, something I do not like doing.

The plan was to drop me off where I needed to be. After I completed my business I'd go to the Pantego Park and read a book til the newly tested vehicle arrived.

On the way I needed to deposit a check. I went to the nearest Chase Bank. The ATMs were being worked on. The bank was busy. Continued on to the Chase Bank in Pantego. The walk-in ATM was out of service and the drive-up one had a long long line.

I decided to go into the bank, make the deposit and get that vexing missing VISA card thing taken care of. I blogged about my fun with Chase Bank a week or two ago. I said at that time that I knew going into the bank was going to turn into yet more silliness.

I'd been told all I had to do was talk to a teller. So, after the teller took the deposit I explained the missing VISA card problem. He listened and then told me this lady out at a kiosk in the middle of the bank could help me. I explained to her what I wanted. She then told me she'd get me a banker. She'd look at one and go, oops, he just got on the phone, after 3 or 4 oops, she led me into the cubicle of this guy named Brandon.

Brandon was very nice. We are doing lunch. He wants to know all about Google ads. I had to show ID, enter my PIN, twice, answer an awful lot of questions, then Brandon made a print out and sprinted across the bank to pick it up. Brandon told me, just like I'd been told before, that the new card will be sent within 2 business days. I asked Brandon for his number so I could call him directly when the card does not show up.

So, after spending way too much time in Chase Bank, it was off to South Pantego where I got dropped off. A half hour later I was in the Pantego Park, acting suspicious, while I read a book by Peggy Noonan.

An hour and a half later Big Ed called. He did not have his wallet. He could not pay for the oil change and emissions test.

The emissions testers would not let Big Ed drive to get me so I could pay for it. I figured I could walk to the emissions testing place, and get there, maybe, before dying from heatstroke. And so I took off walking at high speed. Distance seems way longer walking a road that you'd just driven on. It took me a long while to get to Bowen Street, to head north to Division. I was barely on Bowen when Big Ed called to say they are letting him go, holding his phone hostage til he returns with money.

About 10 minutes later, just as I think heatstroke was starting to happen, Big Ed shows up. I take over driving. The A/C quickly cools me down. We get to the place Big Ed took the vehicle to. Apparently he'd been there before for previous emissions tests. It's run by Iranians, or maybe they were Iraqis. I know for certain they were Middle Eastern and not very conversant in English.

So, I paid the ransom fee and high-tailed it back to the relative safety of Fort Worth, driving without worrying about seeing flashing lights behind me, pulling me over for having an expired emissions test sticker.

So, I am good to go emissions-wise for another year, when I'll be expired by 9/11. I think I've gained at least a half a year by always being late getting the emissions test.

No comments: