Thursday, February 26, 2009

Lord Voldemort's Minions & Warm Water

The morning is half gone. Usually by this point in the day I've been on the computer for hours. When I finally got around to waking up this beast, after it had a long sleep, I was greeted with several very demented comments to this very blog.

But, before I get to the dementia, I must mention it's already in the 70s, the overnight low was 67, the high today is supposed to get to 85. So, with three 80 degree days in a row the water in my swimming pool had warmed up a lot from yesterday's morning attempt to swim, which only lasted 2 minutes, at the most. Today the water seemed warmer than the air. I swam for over a half an hour!

And now on to the dementia. When someone comments on this blog I get sent an email with the comment and the option to publish or reject the comment. Usually it is spam comments I reject. Or if someone is spewing tacky profanity.

This morning I got comments from what I believe to be one of Lord Voldemort's Minions in Tacoma. Like I've mentioned before, there are some very Toxic People in Tacoma. This particular Toxic Tacoma Minion sent 4 comments. The first 3 were pretty much repeating the same thing, but with the tone being like the Minion was working itself up into an ever greater state of agitation, as if the Minion kept accidentally hitting the delete button and was getting frustrated at having to write the comment again.

And then I got the 4th comment and figured out what caused the previous three. Lord Voldemort's Minions are not the brightest lights, pretty much bottom feeders. What happened was this Minion typed the comment, hit the publish button and then got frustrated when the comment did not instantly appear. And so the Minion would try again.

And then the Minion figured it out, and wrote the below comment. (I've covered up the profanity with *)

"Oh you rotten little, cowardice ****-bag. How dare you hide behind a "Comment moderation has been enabled. All comments must be approved by the blog author." you ridiculous little half-****, best you hide your true, moronic self from the public view, maybe try doing that with all that you write."

Now that is funny. I'm a coward(ice) hiding behind comment moderation. While this Minion hides behind "Anonymous." With moderating comments allowing me to hide my true, moronic self from public view.

Now, on to the Minion's moderated comments.

Each began with "After my Scrabble defeat I needed to do something where there was some likelihood that I might not fall down......", copied and pasted from the blogging to which the Minion was commenting.

The quote was followed by the following choice excerpts....

Wow. I didn't think you had it in you. Are you kidding me? It is with the best of intentions that I STRONGLY advise you to avoid any further attempt at communicating with what I shall hereto refer to as,"THE REAL WORLD."

Holy smokes, you rotten, ridiculous bore. It is with great sadness and regret, well, not really, that I intend to inform you...that nobody really gives one half of a **** what it is that you are trying to convey.

Wow, no wonder they want to turn you into a canoe, back in Tacoma. People DO love a canoe, but Jesus, I can't see spending a day on the water, even afloat on your sun-cured hide, and being able to catch a fish surrounded by the stink of your insipid gibberish. To you sir, I say,..."Good Day."

Holy smokes, I didn't think you had it in you. That you still believe, after all this time, that there is some lonely, half-witted soul out there waiting to hear more of the insipid gibberish that runs forth from you.

Like a land-locked turtle, that survives solely upon the filthy, waste filled runoff of it's retched, ghetto surroundings, your audience cries," More! More! Without YOU we have NOTHING!" Do not sir, go about in pity for yourself, go about in pity for these lost, and ignorant souls that still, for God only knows what reason, frequent your ridiculous, one-sided ramblings.

Okay, I have to admit, some of the above is almost poetic. Turn my hide into a canoe? A land-locked turtle? Ghetto surroundings? Apparently this Minion reads my blog. Does this make the Minion one of the lost ignorant souls who read this ridiculous, one-sided, rambling gibberish?


Flutter said...

Lord Voldemort's Minion? I guess I'm one of the lonely half-witted souls who find your ridiculous one-side ramblings to be funny most of the time. This minion person reads your blog, that's obvious, and you somehow upset the person to the point where they make comments over and over again. I wish I had the ability to rile someone up like that! How do people get that twisted that they can't see how ironic they are being?

Durango said...

Flutter? Are you a bird? Thank you for being one of the lonely half-witted souls who find my ridiculous one-sided ramblings to be funny. Most of the time.

Kathy (Cat) said...

Holy double cow. Are those people in Tacoma all like this? is that what put you in a state of shock from being there? That is just unpleasant. Your a nice guy, I know you know that, but it can't be a fun thing to fumble into dealing with such stupid people.

Durango said...

Kathy (Cat), No, I don't think all people in Tacoma are as "off" as Lord Voldemort's Minion. But there are some pretty disturbed people in that town. There's a long history. Ted Bundy grew up in Tacoma. And another thing, you are so right, Kathy, it is not pleasant dealing with such stupid people, and that's what the problem was, more than anything, stupidity, ignorance and mental illness, all rolled into one.