Wednesday, October 22, 2008

The Real Housewives Of Atlanta

Last night was the first night since I got this new TV viewing system, courtesy of AT & T's U-Verse and the DVR thing that comes with it, that I felt like I was finally getting the hang of it. I figured out how to trim down the hundreds of viewing options to just the 10 or so channels I might actually watch.

The best thing is I figured out how to use the DVR. Like last night I came upon a new show on Bravo. Yet one more of those Real Housewives of Some Town shows. This time it's in Atlanta. With the DVR I find if a show starts up and I hit the pause button and then go make popcorn for 10 minutes, when I'm ready to eat my popcorn I hit the play button and start watching from the point I paused. And then can fast forward through the commercials.

Last night I quickly got hooked on the Atlanta housewives. They are even more appalling than the Real Housewives of New York City. And way wealthier.

I was about half way through the first episode, pondering how do these vacuous broads have so much money. And then it was made clear to me. They are mostly all basketball and football wives. Maybe a baseball wife is included, too.

I saw a gaggle of baseball wives once in the Kingdome. It was the first time the Mariners had made it to the playoffs. I was in a luxury booth, courtesy of McDonald's. The luxury booth next door was filled with player's wives. They were all over-dressed and when I saw them in the hall way there was a lot of stupid talk going on. I'm thinking professional sports guys select for a certain type of female for wife material.

Tony Romo may be an exception with his excellent choice in Jessica Simpson. Sort of.

I was appalled at the opulent lifestyles of these wives. So centered on looking good and spending a fortune on clothes and shoes. One of them, Sheree Whitfield, has a shoe shopper bring shoes to her house for her to try on. Shoes that cost in the 1000s of bucks a pair. Sheree bought several. To add to her Imelda Marcos-worth huge closet of shoes. Each of them had someone come to their house to do their hair and makeup. They just had no time to leave the house for such things.

Earlier we got to watch Sheree plan for her elaborate high Atlanta society birthday party. All the attending housewives went to so much bother in the attempt to impress all the other housewives with how fabulous they looked. Including a country singer wannabe named Kim Zolciak. Kim had her clothes designer come over with several choices he'd made just for her. She loved one of them. Sort of a take on a naughty school girl look. Kim has huge frontal assets which made the outlet look real funny.

Kim's special outfit required some alterations. The alterator had to return to his place of alteration. There'd be no time to get the alteration back to Kim's house in time for the party. So, they decided to meet at a Shell Station where she could put on the altered dress. Yes. These are really high class dames.

So, Kim gets to the Shell Station. The altered dress is there. Kim does not want to change in the restroom. So, a makeshift changing room is made with a blanket and her car's door. Kim managed to get into the naughty school girl outfit. She and fellow Real Housewife, Nene, made it to Sheree's party almost 2 hours late, purposefully, to make a fashionably late entry. Unfortunately, Nene was not on the guest list so the bouncer bounced her. Much drama ensued. Nene and Kim ended up leaving without getting to parade in their stunning outfits and professionally made up faces and hair.

We are later shown Kim spending over $25,000 for her daughter's 11th birthday party. A one-day, over night affair that involved a trip in a Hummer limo with about 12 other girls, en route to an Atlanta hotel where more birthday stuff happened. It was all so bizarre I forget the details. On and on it went. At one point, though the daughter was acting perfectly normal, Kim got all upset that the daughter wasn't appreciating all that was being done for her. The daughter actually said something like it's all too much. The daughter was obviously more mature than the mother, so Kim did something right in raising her. About mid-way through the birthday day Kim had had enough of the birthday stress and worry and started to drink. The day ended with Kim naked, getting a massage, and all the little girls invading the massage room, to Kim's displeasure.

Another of the Real Housewives, Deshawn Snow is married to a Cleveland basketball player named Eric. We saw Deshawn interviewing people for the position of being her Estate Manager. Deshawn has 3 boys. She has live-in cook and maid. I'm not quite sure what the Estate Manager was needed for.

The only one of the Real Housewives that I much liked was Lisa Wu Hartwell. She's married to a football player named Ed. They seemed like normal people. Lisa owns her own real estate business. We saw her selling a huge house to a rap producer. Why I liked this pair is at one point Lisa got sick. Ed proceeded to take real good care of her, including making, from scratch, chicken soup. Ed said his mama told him if you like to eat you need to know how to cook.

What appalled me more than anything, watching all this excess, was that the money comes from professional sports. Sheree's divorcing her sports daddy and hoping for a settlement in the 7 figures. She already lives an over the top opulent lifestyle. Financed by all you people who are willing to pay high prices for a game ticket to these ridiculous games. We live in a very twisted world. I think way higher taxes is a real good thing for these people to be spending their money on. Instead of more shoes and $25,000 birthday parties.

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